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They drove in complete silence. When Diane tried to turn on the radio, Holly shot her a look, and she lowered her hand to the wheel again. Eric needed to sit in silence and realize what he’d done.
After Diane pulled into a spot in their apartment parking lot, Holly turned to look at Eric. His face was full of worry, and it broke her to say what she was going to say. “I need some time. I will call you in a few days, and we can talk about this, but I need a minute to process and think about Aimee.”
All he did was nod.
“I’m really sorry, Holly,” he said before she could escape the car.
“Me too.”
She ran inside, hoping to put the awful end to the night far away from her mind.
Throughout the next week, Holly found every opportunity to apologize to Aimee, through actions, through words, and sometimes through more time. Holly’s load hadn’t lightened any, but whenever she could, she came home and hung out around Aimee. Despite Aimee’s anger toward her, the girl didn’t know how to cook, and after a day of refusing the yummy foods Holly made, Aimee gave in. It was the first barrier to break.
Instead of bringing up the pain she’d caused her, both Holly and Diane planned events just with Aimee. They ate every meal together, they studied together, and at night, they cuddled on the couch and watched movies.
By the end of the week, Holly was exhausted and heartbroken. Five times she’d seen Eric on campus, but all she could do was wave. Usually, she was in a hurry and had a good excuse, but the anger and hurt were also still there.
He texted her most nights, but she didn’t return any of them. To fully think about what she should do, it was best to clear her mind completely. So, she would read them, mourn for a few minutes, and then delete the text and return her focus to her work, her class, or her friend.
By Wednesday, she knew exactly what she should do. Within ten minutes of sending Eric a text, he texted back, willing to meet her at their study spot. Thankfully, it was abandoned. She sat on one side of the couch, and he sat on the other.
“How have you been?” he asked.
“Pretty good. Just busy with school and hanging out with the roommates.”
“That’s what Diane told us. I’m glad you’ve been able to mend things with Aimee.”
Her smile wavered. If he hadn’t done what he had, there wouldn’t have been the need for any dramatic repairs. Because of that, she hadn’t seen her best friend—her boyfriend—in five days.
“I think we should take a break.”
He opened his mouth in surprise. “A break? But Holly, you just said things are fine.”
“That’s because we’re not together. If she sees me with you again, it will hurt her again.”
“And what about what we feel? Do you care that I’ve missed you like crazy? That I can’t focus on my work? That I’ve been lagging behind in my studies because I can’t sleep?”
Holly’s confidence swayed as she studied his face. He really did look tired, and his eyes looked desperate to hold her in place.
“I’m not calling it quits for good,” Holly said quietly. “I like you too much. All I’m asking is for time, the time you should’ve given me in the first place, to ease Aimee into the idea of our relationship. It’s our fault her wound is so deep. We should have been more careful.”
Eric dropped his head, then ran a hand through his hair as he sat up. Some strands fell in his face, and she swept them away. He reached up and grabbed her hand and pressed her palm to his mouth. “I miss you so much, Holly.” Every word touched her palm and her heart.
Her heart tightened. “Me too. Soon. Please, just wait for me this time.” She hurried down the steps and hid around a pillar at the bottom of the stairs. It was hard not to doubt her solution once Eric followed. It was important to her to have friends that accepted her for who she was, but was it really worth it when it also hurt others?
17
Eric
It was almost Valentine’s Day, and Eric’s valentine wanted nothing to do with him. His heart hurt every time he saw her across campus. He knew her schedule by heart and had stationed himself near where her classes ended, just to see a glimpse of her.
His grades were abysmal at best. After nights and nights of staying awake, studying into the late hours, he still wasn’t caught up. Nothing seemed good enough. His efforts, his heart, nothing.
He missed his friends as well. He hadn’t visited the girls’ apartment for over two weeks, and it seemed, without them, he had no life. He avoided groups that might ask him to do a raptor impression and went straight home after classes.
On Thursday afternoon, while walking home, he thought about Holly’s empty cupboard. Whenever he saw her come out of class, she never went to eat, and most days, she didn’t leave campus until the end of the day.
Was she eating at home? Was her cupboard full?
