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It hung in the air for a second, daring me to deny it.
I couldn’t.
“Yes. I love him.” It made my cheeks burn to say it out loud, but at the same time it was a huge relief. It felt like I’d been holding it outside me and now it was free. I put my spoon down. “I feel slightly nauseous.”
“That’s good. That’s how you should feel.” She looked triumphant.
“Your point is I should feel sick?”
Marigold wandered in and nicked a cracker off of the counter. She didn’t seem to grasp the rules of Jenny’s kitchen yet. She was still new to the Young family and didn’t understand big love came with following the law of Jenny.
“Hey, no ma’am,” Mama reprimanded. “You ask first. There’s no spoiling your dinner in this house.”
Marigold giggled and bit her cracker.
She was an adorable little sass master.
“Lord, she reminds me of you,” Mama said. “Thinking a smile will get you off the hook.”
“Too bad that doesn’t work anymore,” I said ruefully.
“My point is that you love MacKay. He loves you. This is it, honey. Buckle up, because you’re in for the ride of a lifetime.”
“What if the ride scares me?” Because it did. I was afraid of never living up to the potential that I thought I had. Of never feeling like I could have done anything on my own.
“If you’re scared, just hold someone’s hand,” Marigold told me, reaching out to pet my arm like I was a cat.
“That’s excellent advice,” Mama said. She smiled at me. “Just hold MacKay’s hand.”
“MacKay?” Marigold said, and did that goofy tilt back and forth with her head she used as her go-to when something was weird to her. “He’s strong like Daddy and Miles. I’d hold his hand.”
Mama laughed out loud. “Better snap him up, Faith. There’s probably lots of competition.”
I thought about that. I thought about how I’d feel if MacKay moved on, met someone else, married her. Started a family.
If I thought I felt sick before, that was nothing compared to now. “Oh, sweet Jesus. I think I need to go back to Nashville.”
I needed to kick fear to the curb and get on the ride.
MacKay
Faith shocked both me and Cash by coming back to Nashville the very day after she’d left. She got back to Cash’s around seven, startling both of us when she came in the front door, rolling her suitcase and looking flushed and exhausted.
“What the hell?” Cash asked, astonished, as we both met her in the hallway. “You’re not supposed to be back until Wednesday.”
“I just needed to get back. I saw Conway and he’s fine. For the most part. A little introspective, but that’s normal after a near death experience, I would imagine. Marigold is safely delivered to the parents.”
I took her suitcase from her.
“Thanks,” she said, breathlessly, smiling up at me.
It was a shy smile.
One that took my breath away.
The air seemed to have shifted around us and I wasn’t sure why.
“I’m glad you’re here,” she said. “I thought you’d be back at your place.”
