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“Zeke’s been friendly the last week,” I say, getting to the real reason for my visit. “I wondered if you had something to do withit.”
Jax holds out a hand, and Sophie grabs onto his wrist, giggling as she tries to continue running her laps by dragging her dad with her. Neither Jax nor the chair moves an inch, even when shescreeches.
“He might’ve called me to ask if I’d trust you enough for anothershot.”
“What’d you tellhim?”
“Yes.Obviously.”
“Thank you,” I say and mean it. He waves meoff.
“I know things weren’t easy when you moved to New York. What happened to your dad… You could’ve fallen off the map. Instead, you went into your craft. I wish I’d done thesame.”
Gratitude washes over me, clashing with the guilt. I shouldn’t be keeping secrets from this man. He’s the closest thing I’ve had to afather.
But if Jax suspects something, he doesn’t let on. “Talking to Zeke gave me a distraction from the legal headaches I’ve been dealingwith.”
I straighten in my seat. “So, you’re still trying to get your IP back from Wicked?” I recall the conversation we had over the summer, which was the last time we spoke on thephone.
“It’s looking more and more unlikely.” He grimaces. “Fuck studios. If I was starting over today, I’d start my own label. Not an outreach program like Big Leap. A real studio withclout.”
I cock a brow. “Stillcould.”
He stares at me as if I’m joking, a slow smile splitting his face. “You know, I don’t spend much time wondering when I fucked up. But sending you away might’ve been one of those moments. I said I sent you away for you, for her. But it was for me too. I was afraid for youboth.”
My chest tightens at hiswords.
Sophie babbles at Jax’s knee, and he scoops her up. But even as she presses her face to his chest, his serious eyes are onme.
“You remember Tyler,” he murmurs to hisdaughter.
“Tire,” she repeats evenly. There’s no hesitation in it, no self-consciousness.
Kids have this way of being completely honest. They don’t know how much pain the world can cause. They don’t know what will be expected of them. I envythem.
“If you and Haley had met when you were starting out, do you think you two would’ve ended up together?” Iask.
Jax is quiet so long I think he’s forgotten my question as he gazes toward the house. “I would love Haley in this lifetime or the next. I’d know her if I was deaf, dumb, and blind.” His eyes crinkle at the corners. “I don’t credit the universe with much, because I’ve built everything I have. But could I have fought for us like I did if we’d met at a different time, a different place? That I don’tknow.”
I stare out over the pool. I think of our times here, the party Annie held for the musical, the night she brought me that guitar, a million nights inbetween.
I wanted us then, but maybe it wasn’t ourtime.
I want us now. The truth of that rings throughme.
But I can’t be honest with Jax today, and as much as I hate that, I have to live with it. I care for him like he’s my own father. This man is the only person I’ve leaned on when it comes to my music, myfuture.
But I care for Annie, too. Maybe it proves how much I care for her that I’m willing to risk not once, but twice what I have with him for that chance at something withher.
“I will never forget what you’ve done for me,” I say atlast.
Jax rubs a hand over his jaw, eyes glinting. “That sounds like anapology.”
I don’tanswer.
He shifts out of his chair, hitching Sophie up on his hip. “You’re staying fordinner.”
It’s a statement, not aquestion.
