I had never seen her look so unimpressed as she watched me struggle. “I gather things were not just physical by the end. Now on your end, are you capable of not choking for long enough to confirm or deny that?”
“Confirm,” I wheezed, trying to take big breaths and stop my throat from trying to strangle itself. “Christ, just…confirm.”
“So, you had romantic feelings for him in the process.”
“Yes.”
“Like so many before you,” she said wryly. “For however long he’s been playfully courting people, he has always left a few broken hearts behind him. It was never intentional on his part, at least not lately. I can’t speak for when he was even more foolish, as teenagers tend to be.”
“Sophia, please spare me the absolute horror that is this conversation and cut to the chase,” I pleaded, wishing she would just shut up and let me soak in my embarrassment for the rest of the night…perhaps the rest of my life.
“If you have feelings for him, why is it you continue to keep him at arm’s length?” she asked.
I frowned. “If you spoke to him, then you know he’s the reason we’re…just friends now. He was the one who said there were no feelings for me on his end, and we were better no longer being involved with one another.”
“And what did you say to that?”
“A lot of…a few things, none of which I’m willing to repeat.”
“I see. You lashed out.”
“And I spoke to him about that later, among a few other things.”
“Including, it seems, his notable absence from my bedroom and house while I was at my worst,” she said, eyes locked on my face.
I blinked and then shrugged. “That was definitely a topic that came up.”
“Yes, Kevin, I know you’re the one who spoke to him and inevitably gave him the nudge to stop ignoring the fact that I was quite possibly dying,” she said softly. “My offer for private employment did not come simply from your skills or your admirable willingness to stand up to my son and myself. It also came about because you proved you were willing to live up to your ideals and morals, even when I’m sure facing my son after your falling out and showing him such compassion was probably difficult.”
“I…thank you, Sophia,” I said, taken aback and touched by the absurdly gentle way she spoke.
“You’ve earned the respect you’ve been given,” she said, finally standing up. It was slow, but she barely wobbled as she took to her feet. “Now, perhaps it’s time you think about the respect and treatment you should be having.”
I stood up, setting the now empty glass aside. “I don’t understand.”
“Think about our conversation,” she said, raising a brow. “Or perhaps you should talk to my son about our conversation. Perhaps he’ll even find it in himself to get over that absurd pride of his, stay his stubborn self-control, and share with you what he and I discussed.”
“I’m not sure I understand.”
“Then go figure it out,” she told me sharply. “If I feel the need to have you in this house, I’ll text you. But I know he’s down in that little shack of his, stewing away as he’s surely been doing all day and probably will be doing for hours to come. I’ll even be kind enough to close my window, so I don’t have to hear if you get into another arguing match…among other things.”
I glanced at the windows and could practically feel the blood draining from my face. Never in the whole time Shane and I had been going about our private business had I given a thought to those windows. The same windows that looked down upon the entire backyard and onto the front of his house.
I didn’t even want to begin to imagine what she’d seen and heard in the past few months.
“I think that will be all, Kevin,” she said, making her slow but steady way back to her bed. “I’m quite exhausted, and if I don’t get enough rest, I’m sure I’ll have to deal with another lecture.”
“Sure, Sophia,” I said faintly, walking mechanically toward the door. “Call me if you need me.”
* * *
I managed to last two hours before I finally gave in to Sophia’s advice and once more left the safety and quiet of the kitchen. This time, however, I went through the back door, making sure to turn my phone’s ringer on rather than vibrate. The snow that had partially melted from the unseasonably warm weather we’d had for March had once again frozen in the cold of the night, making the trek down to Shane’s cottage more treacherous than usual.
After taking twice as long to get there and nearly falling on my ass on at least three separate occasions, I managed to make it to his front door in one piece. I had only raised my hand to knock when it opened to reveal Shane. The sight of him in a loose shirt and lounge pants was far better than when I’d seen him in rumpled business clothes the last couple of visits I’d made.
“Hi,” I said, blinking against the light pouring in from the living room behind him.
Shane chuckled. “I spotted you the minute you left the backdoor.”