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“You can ask,” I said to Aidan. “I just might not agree to what you want.”
His nod was swift as I tightened my fingers around that small little nub.
“Fuck,” he gasped. “I feel that in my cock. You sure about this no below the waist thing?”
He said it with a laugh, groaning when I pulled away and turned to Peter. It was tempting to take it further, but we’d agreed.
Be more stringent about boundaries. It’s not your job to please everyone, Ophelia had said. Try doing it in small ways in your life. Not taking tea if you don’t want it. Not agreeing to do things you don’t enjoy, then move onto bigger things.
Aidan had smiled though, watching me move closer to the other man, and there was something entirely unselfish in his expression. He seemed to like to watch as much as being a participant. I shifted until I faced Peter, placing a hand on his knee and then moved in.
He didn’t give much away, it was only the rapid flex of his stomach as his breath came faster that indicated how he might feel about this.
Their reactions are theirs. Don’t mind read. Don’t spend all your energy being a detective. That’s not your responsibility and all part of the abuse—making you feel like things that are entirely the abuser’s decision are somehow your fault. You want to be considerate, that’s good. Do so by asking, touching base, checking in.
I swallowed as I formed my words in my head, feeling the need to say them but finding it difficult to get them out. This felt so clunky and weird, but I forced my spine straight, looked Peter in the eye, and said, “Where do you like to be touched?”
He surged forward, causing me to shrink back, but I caught myself before I ran. He took my hand, pulling me closer and closer, until I hung over him. He placed my palm over his heart, held in place by his, and said, “Here. I like it here.”
Did that…? Was he…? I shook my head, trying to stop that train of thought. Stay in the moment, Flick. So I settled down beside him, replacing my hand with my head, resting it on his breastbone. I felt the tension leach out of him at that, as his arm went around me. I reached out, slowly and tentatively with my free hand, and placed it on his stomach, feeling the flesh jump at my touch. I glanced up at him, checking to see if he was OK, and was rewarded by a long, hot look. One that only intensified as my hand began to roam, but I watched him, not it. I saw the moment his eyes darkened, when his lips fell open, when a long shaking exhale hissed out. I felt the low rumble of pleasure vibrate all the way through my body as my hands moved.
“Fuck, that’s hot.”
I turned to see Aidan watching my every move, which led to me rolling towards him. I’d had a drunken threesome with a couple of guys back at uni, but this was a whole other deal. I felt that same old tension in my chest. How was I going to meet both their needs? When I was with one, I had to ignore the other. There was always going to be someone left out.
“Hey,” Aidan said. “Stop worrying.” He pulled me so I lay flat on the bed and they rolled towards me. It was unnerving and reassuring all at once. They were like walls of muscle around me, ready to protect me from everything and anyone.
“We want you to be happy, Flick,” Peter said. “You took a big step today, but I think we should stop things now. Let's just have this.”
“Close your eyes,” Aidan said, watching me fight the suggestion before I gave in.
Something snarly inside me just got wound up tighter as I did so, but then I felt them. It was both nonsexual and yet completely sensual. Together, they swept their hands up the outsides of my legs, nowhere near the sensitive inner thigh, even though with every pass, I wanted it more. Not when my thighs separated, falling limp and slack under their touch, much to Aidan’s amusement. Not when I felt myself grow slick. They just stroked me and stroked me, soothing my unruly nervous system, quietening my body and then my mind, until I fell asleep.
It was one of the worst night’s sleeps I’d had since coming to Sanctuary, but when I woke up at some ridiculous hour, I couldn’t bring myself to care. I slept half naked, tangled in my men—because that’s what they were, I realised, for now at least. It might not work out, we might not be compatible as a…throuple? But I knew now I had the time to figure that out. I woke up a million times due to the entirely decadent feel of their hard bodies intertwined with mine, their unconscious shifts towards me, pulling me into their arms and burying their heads in my hair, as if breathing me in made them sleep better.
Aidan groaned into my shoulder, shoving his groin into me so I could feel every inch of his considerable length before waking up.
“So, it wasn’t a dream?” he asked in a groggy voice.
“If it was, I still want to be asleep,” I replied.
He moved so he could look over my shoulder at me, studied my face, then smiled.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Peter replied for me. “Morning,” he said before leaning over and kissing me.
I’d meant to protest about morning breath or something, but that all faded away quickly. There was no hunger in this kiss for once. Instead, it was a leisurely sweet thing.
“If this isn’t a dream, can this happen on a regular basis?” Aidan asked as he pulled me back against him, making sure I knew just how keen he was on that idea.
“Aidan, don’t pressure her,” Peter said.
“Why?” I asked with a smile. I leant back to offer my mouth to Aidan. “Maybe I want you guys drowning me in kisses throughout the day.”
“Yeah?” He gave me at least one. “You’d be OK with that, us touching you when Kade’s around?”
“In the
