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He cupped my cheek. I leaned into it.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, pretty girl.”
“I’ll miss you.”
“Good.”
10
Nash
I’d left the ranch with emotions running high—both mine and Aya’s—and I’d spent a couple hours with the kittens, hoping their antics would calm me.
They’d made me laugh and curse their sharp teeth and claws, but my pleasure increased as I left Steve in charge. He scowled down at the furballs flipping over his feet, batting at his shoelaces.
I clapped him on the shoulder, the first time I’d touched him in…I couldn’t remember. “Remember how you want to prove you’re an awesome father? Well, now’s your chance to showcase all those nurturing instincts.”
His scowl deepened. “I never said I wanted to be an awesome father.” But something shifted in his eyes. He stood a little straighter, his chin tipped up. As expected, he’d taken the challenge. “And I am a good parental figure.”
I leaned against the kitchen counter. They were a soft, dove gray. I wasn’t sure about the color when I’d bought the place, associating it with IKEA, but the room, the house, was growing on me. I appreciated the quiet of the smooth, cool stone and the rich sheen of the maple cabinets. There was something about the clean lines and muted, earthy tones that calmed me, kept me grounded.
Or maybe it was simply sticking in one place, something I hadn’t done since high school.
“Sure, Pops. You’re fabulous.”
His scowl slid toward worry. Worry for me. “Are you okay with Aya showing up? Do you need to talk to your therapist?”
“I do talk to him—which you know—every day. Jordan and I had a short session this morning while Aya was getting ready. And as far as Aya being back, I’m good.”
Mayet climbed up Steve’s pants leg, making hissing sounds, her tiny, white dagger-teeth bared. Jigsaw grabbed her flicking tail and bit, twisting his head back and forth. Mayet let go with a scream, turning to land with her claws out on Jigsaw’s back.
I chuckled. “They like to play. Kinda like Lev and me.”
Steve raised his head from the kittens’ antics. “You miss him.”
“Every day. He’s a hole in my soul.”
“Nash…”
I raised my hand, my heart pounding so hard my ribs ached. “We’re not there yet. I don’t care what Pop Syad’s will says or that you want to tell me you were just the hired muscle. I was a kid. I’d lost my brother, and I needed a father. You weren’t it.” I turned on my sneakered heel and called over my shoulder. “Enjoy the cats.”
As I rounded the corner, I caught a glimpse of Steve, hands braced against the counter, forearms bulging. And tears shining in his eyes.
I refused to look at any social media, and I ignored the links to stories Hugh sent me about Aya and me reconnecting. I wanted these days to remain unsullied by others’ opinions. We were together, and we were going to be happy.
That’s what I told myself anyway as I drove back to the ranch for lunch with Aya. Still, my body felt stiff and my skin too tight as I pulled onto the gravel drive.
I’d laid in the dark last night, restless because I wanted Aya in my bed. I wanted to make her mine, to erase other men’s touches. Fuck, I hated that men had touched her.
She was mine.
But we needed to reacquaint ourselves and get comfortable around one another again. That’s the part I could admit most easily. I knew there was more—more of our past to discuss, more of a foundation to forge—but that was harder to envision. It could be messy.
I exited my Tesla, ignoring the muttering from my security staff as they piled out of Aya’s rental behind me. Brandon, my new head of security hand-chosen by Chuck, sat in the back seat of my SUV, adamant that he ride with me, even if I was driving. I’d felt his glare on the back of my head the entire drive, which hadn’t alleviated my concerns about the emotions I struggled to control.
I strode toward the house but changed direction when I heard Aya laughing. She was seated on an appaloosa quarter horse, wearing dusty cowboy boots with her jean-clad legs clamped tight to the pony’s body as she whipped through a turn on the obstacle course in the front riding pen.
Chuck was also astride, which told me Cam must be at home—probably enjoying a lazy morning with Jenna. Mama Grace leaned her forearms against the top rail of the piping fence, painted a sparkling white.
