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She pursed her lips. “He rubs off on a person.” She leaned toward Aya’s teacup as I turned to go. “What are you drinking? Is it herbal or decaf? I could go for something without caffeine…”
I followed Hugh and Steve outside and helped them bring in the boxes of shoes.
“She bought the place out,” Steve muttered.
“Damn near it,” Chuck said on a hefty sigh. “And she wanted me to carry boxes. No, siree. I had to be sharp in case something happened.”
My lips twitched as we carried the parcels inside, and I realized that while I still didn’t know what to do about Steve, Hugh, Cam, and Chuck had been with me just as long. And Jenna mothered me nearly as much as Mrs. Grace.
What a time to realize how many people I had in my corner, rooting for me. More than I’d ever thought possible. But only Aya’s opinion could break me.
We’d had a good morning, but she hadn’t agreed to stay. Maybe she wouldn’t, and part of me couldn’t blame her. We’d hurt each other so deeply, and while we’d dealt with some of that, more of it needed to be lanced.
I wasn’t sure how to do that—how to explain what her disappearance had done to me. Even these moments with her in the house with Jenna—away from my direct line of sight—caused an edginess I didn’t know how to process. Until I managed to get that promise from her, fear would continue to ride me.
6
Aya
Jenna turned to look at me. “While they’re gone, I wanted to ask, are you planning to stay?”
I opened my mouth but then slammed it shut. I’d simply hopped on a plane, needing to get back home, needing to see Nash—and, yes, to get away from the maelstrom Alistair’s surprise proposal had made of my life. Talk about a crazy move. I never did anything without thought and planning.
Except I had once before. My father had made it sound rational then, but was it? I’d simply left Nash with the fallout of his first drug experience—an unwanted one. A violation. And I’d refused to hear him in London, too blinded by my own emotions and fears.
“I… Austin’s home,” I said, feeling more confident now that the words were out there.
Jenna nodded. “In some ways, we are so alike. So, do you plan to stay with Nash?”
“I don’t know.” I twisted my fingers. “I just got on a plane. That’s so unlike me.”
“Why’d you do it?” Jenna asked, voice soft.
I swallowed. “Part of it was what you said, part of it was defiance of my father and Alistair. But I’d already realized how much I missed Austin, and I thought about how much I missed Nash. I’d been trying to push on without this place, my only home, without him.”
“And when that failed, you decided to come back.” Jenna nodded. “I did the same thing, leaving Seattle after that trial.” She waved her hand. “We’re not talking about me. Just know, I get it. And you already have Nash and Hugh, Mama Grace, Cam, Kate, me—we’re all in your corner, Aya. Whatever you decide.”
“I don’t want to drag Nash’s name through the mud because I look like an opportunist. That’s part of what people will say.” I twisted my hands together, tugging at my fingers—an effort to release the tension building inside me. “That I tossed over Alistair for a better option.”
“There will always be chatter,” Jenna said gently.
I touched my fingertips to my forehead, my mind whirling. “I don’t handle the mean comments well.”
“Who does? I sure don’t.” Jenna stared into my eyes. “Only way to get through is one step at a time.”
“I’m scared.”
“I was, too, when I started dating Cam. Why don’t you come out and stay with Mama Grace? She’d love the company. Or…you can stay with Cam and me at our place. Whatever you prefer. That’ll give you and Nash time to get to know each other again without jumping straight into bed and confusing great orgasms with zen-like connections of the soul.”
“Erm…”
Jenna waved her hand. “I say weird shit. I can’t seem to help it, so just ignore it. Unless you find it charming. Then you can tell me I’m better than chocolate and peanut butter. Mmm... Do you have that?”
“I bet Steve can find some,” I said, my eyes widening.
Jenna shook her head. “Better not. If I start, I may not stop. I love eating right now. My ass is going to be bigger than a hippo’s, and not near as firm.”
I bit my lip to keep from giggling. I pressed my teacup to my mouth and burned it a little in an effort to keep the laugh in.
