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Violet had thought about it before, but the idea of going back to school didn’t seem right for her. Violet’s original degree was supposed to be accounting, but then she secretly switched it to English one year in. Once her mom had found out, Violet had come up with a bullshit plan for her to get her PHD and work for some big University like Harvard or Yale.
Deep down, she knew that was never what she wanted.
Maybe teaching wasn’t a glamorous job, and maybe she didn’t have a lot of money to spare, but at least she knew she was good at it.
“It’s okay. I may not like every aspect of my job, but I do like most of it. Mainly the teaching.”
“Even if they’re sixth graders?”
“Especially when they are. I could have easily gone into high school teaching by taking a few extra classes, but I felt like sixth graders were at the perfect place to learn. If they have a good teacher, it would set them up so well for future classes. I’ve only been doing this for six years, but my first set of kids have done so well in high school. It makes me happy I was able to do that.”
Charlie had paused in his eating and now stared at her.
“I thought you hated it," Charlie said after a moment. “I mean… you always made it sound like you did, and Lauren did say for you to be a middle school teacher.”
Hearing Lauren’s name soured Violet’s mood. She didn’t realize how much resentment had grown overnight.
“I resent her for the comment, yes. I hate how low my salary is, and how I have to scramble to get by. I hate the standardized tests and the way people talk to me when I have an issue with their kid. But the rest - the actual teaching? I like that.”
“Then I suppose that’s one less thing I have to feel bad for.”
“Why do you feel bad?” Violet asked. “Lauren made the comments, not you.”
“I know, but … I should have looked at the document after you went off. I knew something was off, but I didn’t.”
“I could have asked too. There were loads of things we did wrong, but we’re trying to be better today than we were yesterday. That’s all we can do.”
It was one of the things she had learned to live with after moving out from her mother’s household. She couldn’t change the past. Only move forward.
“But if I had done something differently… maybe things would have been like this for the last six years.” He gestured between the two of them.
“Like this?” Violet asked.
“I don’t know," Charlie replied. “It’s easier to talk to you than fight with you.”
Violet blushed, knowing he was right. This was far easier.
“We have right now,” she said. “So, let’s focus on getting it right in this moment. Not what we did wrong.”
“You’re right.”
“How are you, by the way? About Lauren, I mean. Still feeling relieved?”
“You ask like I’ll change my mind at any moment.”
Violet shrugged. “Maybe you will.”
Charlie shook his head. “No. Not this time. I’m mad, I really am. Plus, we’ve gone months without talking.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. I could never stay with her for more than a year. Near the end, maybe a month.”
“That’s awful. No wonder you don’t believe in love.”
Charlie shrugged. “It’s not a huge deal.”
“It kind of is. She sucks.”
