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He laughs out loud, cackling like a goose. “You never did anything because I was your legal guardian. You follow orders because you know the consequences if you don’t. You’re not just a pretty face, are you? You’re very smart. You know when it’s pointless to fight. You know when you’ve already lost.”
“Why do you do this?” I seethe. “Many people would be happy to work for you. There are criminals who would die to be on your side. They would be so loyal. I’m not. I’ll never be. I’ll leave any chance I get. You know it.”
He slowly gets up as another laugh breaks from his chest, shorter this time.
“Because Ican, Jake. You’re useful to me. You and your siblings were easy to get. You were just unloved orphans in a shit place.”
He readjusts his tie. “I have no time to look for people that might or might not be loyal. I’ve put a lot of work into you. I raised you, I groomed you to become a soldier for me. And you know too much now. I don’t want to get rid of you just so you don’t spill my little secrets. I mean, I will kill you if Ireallyhave to. But, believe it or not, I love you kids. I loveyou, I love Nate and…”
He titters. Not mockingly this time though. It’s irrepressible, the kind that comes before an overpowering truth. “God only knows how much I love Rose.”
My body jumps from my chair so suddenly, everything on the table in front of me rattles. I’m panicking, I need something,anything. So I grab the steak knife in front of me.
“Don’tfuckingsay this. Take it back. Take it back, I’ll kill you, Bianco.” I take a step to round the table but there are already armed men cocking their guns at me.
Still, I grab his tie and pull until his head almost hits the table. He puts his hands so his nose doesn’t break but he doesn’t defend himself. Why isn’t he defending himself?
“Let’s not both lose our lives in one night. Put the knife down. I can’t take it back, Jake. No one can control love. Not even you. You love control so much, but there’s nothing you can do about love. That’s why you saw Jamie yesterday, right?”
My heart is beating too fast. It’s palpitating. I’m panting without having done anything. I sound like I ran a marathon.
“I…” I pant. I’m dizzy. Fuck, why do I feel so dizzy? There’s a veil of fog in front of my eyes.
“Are you alright? You’re looking a bit pale. Do you need anything?” His words sound honest but the smirk on his face tells me he’s finally getting what he wanted. I glance next to his face and look at the glass of water I just had. The one he personally gave to me earlier.
“What did you do?” My voice sounds far. I release him and take a step back.
I look around just to realize I’m losing all sense of depth. Bianco is walking around me and I’m trying to follow but his body splits into two, then four.
“You fucking drugged me,” I wheeze.
“Now, now. You must be really hungover from your party with Jamie yesterday, son.”
“Fu…” My mouth feels like cotton, and I can’t finish my sentence. I try again. “Fu…y…”
Fuck you, Bianco! You fucking piece of shit!My voice shouts in my head but nothing comes out. It just echoes to infinity.
I hear the door opening, I see Rose coming in but she’s miles and miles away from here. There’s a long stretch for her to reach me, she’ll never make it.
I put a hand in front of me to hold myself on the chair. I miss and my ass hits the floor.
“Jake…” her voice is a surprise far away from me. She drops the cake she was holding to the floor.
I roll to the side until I realize I’m on my stomach, my left cheek against the warm hardwood floor. All I see are feet and the cake. There are so many though. How many?
Try. Count. Focus.
Bianco’s face lowers in front of me, he looks magnified. One eye is huge, one is tiny, his mouth is the size of a horse’s.
“You should use that rest to think of your mistakes, Jake. Think hard again. Our agreement. Remember that?”
I want to say something so desperately, but I feel completely paralyzed. Only my eyes are still working, wide open as I watch Bianco join Rose. I watch her take steps back in fear, putting her hands right in front of herself to keep him away.
Get up, get up, get up!
I can’t.
I blink and he’s got her ponytail wrapped around his fist.
