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He shakes his head and straightens up. I have to stretch my neck to look into his eyes.
“I don’t want another relationship with you, ‘Me. I wantyou. I want all of you, all night. I promise after sending you home tomorrow, I will get your mom out of jail.”
I shake my head in disbelief. “You can’t be serious.”
“Oh I am, believe me. Do it and when I let you go in the morning, you will never be the same again. There are things I’ve been dying to do to you, beautiful. I’ve held myself back and pretended to be the sweet guy when we were together. I was taken by surprise last time, when we had sex, and I held backagain, by fear of scaring you away. But tonight…tonight you’re all mine and I will show you just how far you can be pushed. How much you love being used as a little slut.”
“Fuck you,” I rage as I push him away and get off the stool. “God, you’re the worst, Nathan. You…you…ugh.” I stumble on my words from the fury.
Why am I letting him affect me still?
“How hard has it been to stay away from me since you and Jake broke up?” he asks out of topic.
“I’m not getting into that.”
“You’ve been dying for me to fuck you. You’re scared of losing Jake forever and so you don’t. You want to keep a semblance of strength, but youknowyou want to do this. Deep down you know you’re not getting Jake back and you’re ready to go for the other person you can’t resist.”
“Stop it.” My voice trembles under the forceful truth.
“I’m offering you an out, ‘Me. An excuse. I’m holding something over you, you can pretend you don’t have a choice.”
He takes a quick step toward me, grabbing my hips and pushing me against the edge of the island.
“If you get caught, you can scream that I blackmailed you, that I’m just a horrible guy. Come on, ‘Me. Let go. Completely.”
My breathing is too fast, it’s stopping my thoughts from functioning.
I shake my head one last time, but it’s not very convincing. He puts both his hands on each side of my cheeks and stops my head movement.
“Iama horrible guy. I will keep you locked here, I will use you, I will abuse your body, and I will give you no chance of respite.”
A soft whimper escapes my lips. This sounds too real.
“And you know what the worst thing will be?”
I try to shake my head no, but he’s stopping me anyway.
“You’re going to love it,” he concludes.
He thinks he’s got me. He really believes he’s got me all figured out, like his brother. How many times do they think they can play me like that?
“No.” I finally say. I’m not about to let another White play with my need for submission and my darkest fantasies. I’m not-
“Fine. I hope your mom likes prison food.”
“What?!” I choke. “You can’t do this you can’t…you’re evil!”
“When did you start thinking I was a good guy?” His grip on my head becomes tighter, pouting my lips. “Give yourself to me, Jamie. You’re going to fucking love it,andyour mom will be free. Win-win.”
There was something I had never quite realized. That if Ididn’tgive into my sick need to be dominated. Nathan would simply take it.
And what are you meant to do when all you want is save the person who means the most to you in this entire world?
His head drops, his lips are just below my ear. His breath on my skin burns, his soft soapy scent invades me.
“So, do we have a deal?”
And what a deal it is.
