AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Is Bianco doubting Aaron Williams is the one killing his men?
“Do you?”
He doesn’t respond, so I insist. “Nate, do you know who’s killing Bianco’s men?”
“Stop asking questions, Jake,” he avoids answering again.
“Who were they?”
“A bunch of fucking strong guys, stop asking questions!” He hits the steering wheel hard enough to honk.
“I don’t want to go to D.C.,” Ozy says in a quieter voice.
“I fucking know that,” Nate fumes. “It’s not like I haven’t been trying to delay it for months.”
He runs a hand through his dirty blond hair. They’re undone, a mess from the night he must have spent awake. Our eyes cross in the rearview mirror and I can see the desperation in them, they reflect my own. I think…I think he was genuinely trying to avoid the worst for us.
“He can’t make me go,” Ozy says again. “I won’t go. He’s delusional! He’ll have tokidnapme if he wants me to go there.”
My gaze crosses with Nate’s again when my sister mentions kidnapping. The fear in them is freezing, the silence is deafening.
CHAPTER 18
Traitor – Olivia Rodrigo
Jamie
The laugh that explodes from my lungs makes me spit the coke I was drinking.
“You havegotto be kidding me,” I howl, my eyes not being able to leave the awful tattoo inked into Chris’ forearm. “What sort of weekend did you have?” It’s already Friday, but I haven’t seen Chris all week, clearly he had a crazy two days last weekend.
Not the same as me, that’s for sure. Last Friday had marked a whole week of Jake and I not talking after our night at Luke’s – after we had anal for the first time and he left me alone on the floor. Thoroughly fucked, high on orgasms, and disorientated.
He did it on purpose, he wanted to make me feel used and discarded and he hit exactly where it hurts. He made me swear off parties for the rest of my life. At least the ones he attends. I’m not just healing a broken heart, I’m also healing a broken ego. Even today, two weeks later.
The message was loud and clear, ‘stay away from me’. He’s keeping me at arm’s length, he wants me away from him and he’s trying to hurt me to achieve it. He’s protecting me, it’s never felt more like it. Except I can’t keep coming back. No matter how much I love him, I can’t keep getting hurt.
I’ve been living the last few weeks thinking I was doing a great job at staying away. Except I realized it’s not me staying away, it’s him. The only moments nothing happens are because he’s managing to resist our fatal attraction. Every time something does happen is because he’s snapped and failed himself. I’m not strong, all I do is desperately wait for him to not be able to resist me.
How pathetic.
I spent last weekend with Mom. It’s not like I can do much else anyway. I still have no phone, I’m still grounded. It seems like it’ll be that way forever. We’re slowly talking to each other again and spending quality time together. As long as I don’t bring up the harsh punishment she’s brought upon me, we can get along. It’s not ideal, but at least there’s no risk of bumping into Jake.
You’ll get over him. Let time do its thing.
I feel like I’ve been repeating this for four months. When will it work? The squeeze at my heart every time someone mentions his name is unbearable. How do I fall out of love?
Even now, listening to Chris recounting his last weekend with the twins and Ella brings pangs of jealousy I wasn’t aware I could feel. Why doesn’t Jake want me to be part of his life?
Chris is the kindest soul I’ve ever met. He saw Emily wasn’t here today and said he would spend every single free period with me today. I can’t blame my best friend for not coming, I would have if I thought it would help. Today marks the third year of Aaron’s disappearance. Today marks three years of my dad’s death. Today marks three years of being kidnapped and shot.
I squeeze my eyes shut and open them again. I can’t get the vision out of my head. The smell, the sound.
At least it’s Friday, just one day and I can shut off from the world for two whole days.
“You haven’t touched your food.” Chris’ low voice brings me out of the nightmare. I don’t even know when he stopped talking about his weekend.
“I’m not hungry,” I rasp.
