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“No sweetheart, come on, just relax. Listen to my voice, take in a deep breath.”Mymind is bombarding me with images of Linda, my body is shutting down and I don’t mind. At the moment I don’t want to think about what happened to my beautiful sister, I don’t want to think about the pain that my mother is going to have to endure, I don’t want to think about not ever seeing or speaking to her again.
“Onix.” I hear Hawk call my name urgently, but I am beyond listening, I can feel myself hyperventilating, my vision blackening. I hear him roaring, as he calls Dakota’s name but at the moment I don’t care, at the moment I just want to get away from my thoughts. I don’t know if I do loseconsciousness, but I can hearHawk’sloud voice and then a woman, opening my eyes I feel like I am seeing everything in a daze.
Dakota is standing over me, an injection in her hand, Hunter and Blue are holding Hawk back. He is growling his muscles straining as he fights to come to me. I want to tell him that I’m fine, but my mind feels like it is floating and then darkness is descending over me again.
I don’t know how long I am in a daze; all I know is that sometimes I would open my eyes and every time I would find Hawk there right next to me. Sometimes I could hear his calming voice, sometimes growls and sometimes kisses on my face, my neck. Opening my eyes, I look to my left to find Hawk there, his eyes are closed, and he seems to be resting. His hair is wild around his head, his unshaven jaw giving him a look of danger.
I remember waking up sometimes crying and he was always there taking me into his arms, calming me. My head feels slightly woozy, but otherwise I’m feeling clearer. My heart still feels like it has been wrenched from my chest, but I now feel steady enough to face what is to come. Lifting my arm, I stroke my fingers over his jaw, immediately his eyes pop open and he is looking at me.
“Hey.” I murmur and find that my voice is hoarse.
“You’reawake,” He murmurs, his eyes guarded, “how are you feeling?”
“My mind feels woozy, butit'sclearer.” I say, he turns his head and kisses my palm, “How long have I been out?”
“Today is the second day.” I nod.
“I’m sorry,”Atmy apology he frowns, lifting on his side he rests his head on his raised hand.
“No, don’t apologise. I am the one that is sorry that I wasn’t able to protect you against this.” I feel a sadness deep in my soul, I don’t know if I will ever be able to smile again but one thing I do know is that this man that is laying next to me gives me strength.
“Thank you for being with me, I know that you have been here.I remember waking sometimes and you were always here.” He strokes my cheek and then he leans forward and kisses my forehead.
“I just wish I could take this pain away, but I promise to be there next to you every step of the way.” I feel a tear slip and roll down my cheek, I swear I thought I wouldn’t have any tears left. He wipes it away with his thumb.
“I need to phone my mother.”Thisis going to be the most difficult conversation of my life; how do you tell a parent that their child is dead.
“Don’t worry about that, she phoned yesterday, and I answered. Blue and Dixon have gone to pick her up and bring her here. Don’t worry, I haven’t told her, I just said that you weren’t feeling well and that we could get her to come and be with you and she agreed.” I can feel my heart racing at the fact that my mom will be here, and I will have to tell her that Linda has died, but it is better that I tell her in person then by phone.
“I don’t know how to tell he. . .” I confess as my voice breaks at the knowledge that I am going to destroy her.
“If you want, I can tell her.” I turn my head and kiss hisknuckles.
“Thank you, but it will be better if it comes from me. When will she be here?”
“They will be back in a couple of hours.” I nod, I better get up and get ready. I need to be strong for her, if she sees me like this it will just be worse. Sitting up I feel my head spinning, immediately Hawk has his arms around my waist,his chest against my back.
“Slowly.”Hisvoice is gruff against my ear. I lean back against him for a minute feeling his warmth surrounding me.
“This is so hard.” I whisper and feel him kiss my head.
“I know.”Hisarms tighten around my waist pulling me closer to his chest.
“I wish I could just be like this; you make me feel safe.”
“When you are with me, you will always be safe. I will protect you until my last breath.” A tear slides down my cheek, I wish I had found Hawk earlier in my life maybe then we could have prevented this from happening. “Now, I will help you into the shower, dress and then you need to eat.” The mention of food makes me feel nauseous, but I know that he’s right, me not eating won’t bring Linda back and I need to be strong for my mother now.
HAWK 16
I look over at Onix that is sitting at one of the tables near the front of the club with Dakota and Sam, these last two days have been hell. I never want to feel like that again, a feeling of uselessness, seeing my woman hurting and I am not able to do anything. I lost my shit the first day, if it had not been for my brothers holding me back, I don’t know what I would have done. Seeing my vixen brought down like that because a fucker decided to have his perverted, sick way with her sister had my wolf in a frenzy to go hunt and kill.
“She will be fine,” Goliath says as he comes to stand next to me in the doorway. “Just give it time,” I glance over at him to see him looking at the three women.
“What if she wants to go home now that she knows what has happened to her sister?”Thethought that Onix will still want to go home after everything has my stomach knotting. I can’t leave my pack; I could go see her maybe every month but that would drive my wolf and me insane. Not knowing what is happening with my mate, not being able to be there to protect her would drive my fury.
“The bond has taken Hawk trust in the process. I can see the way your woman looks at you, the way she glances this way every couple of minutes like you do with her. Don’t worry brother, whatever you are feeling for your mate she feels it too.” I know that what he says is true, but I have also come to see how strong headed Onix is.
“Now come, King wants to talk to you.” Fuck, I can just see him take a bite out of my hide for the way I lost control when Onix passed out. My shoulder is still as sore as fuck from the Initiation bite he gave me, the bruising and teeth marks in clear evidence.
