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"You told me you love me.”
He groaned in agreement, encouraging her to continue. "You can't. You don't even know me."
"Not true."
"Fine. When did you first know that you loved me?"
She was whispering into the darkness. There was only a sliver of light coming through her curtains, but it didn't help her any to be able to see his face.
"It was years ago, I think. You interested me from your Initiation, but I didn't really start looking at you beyond a passing interest until you got closer to Dexter and your female friend. I had a different perspective before then, too."
"What was I like?"
"Before? You were much more closed off and shy. You seemed like you had something to prove to the world. It was when you realized you were gaining some support and a few friends there that you seemed to stop feeling that way. You started opening up more, and that's when I discovered how infectious your laugh and smile were." He wrapped an arm around her waist tentatively, giving her a chance to pull away if she wanted to, it seemed. She didn't, and he pulled her against his chest.
"So, you fell in love with my laugh?" she asked.
"No, I fell in love with your passion. You had, and still have, passion for everything you set your mind to. I learned a lot about you by observing you from afar. How you hate being told 'no', but have no problem telling someone else it. How you seem to compare yourself to Jezebeth and think you measure up less than her. Which you don't," he asserted.
He was quiet for a moment before he continued. "I've also gotten the impression that you wish Chance was your biological father."
"I don't...I mean..." She choked on her words. How could he possibly know that she'd thought that before? She didn't think she'd ever said it out loud, but he was right. She'd wished many times, even before she was introduced to the Cantil, that she didn't know a life before him, with her biological dad. It would be less complicated to explain to others and less complicated to her heart. Even though it had been years, she also felt weird when she called him "Dad". She felt by saying it, she was forgetting about her first dad, but it felt wrong not to call him that. While her biological father raised her for the first six years of her life, Chance had also been there for her just like any father would be.
"It's alright to feel like that, you know," he said quietly. "It's understandable. I’ve wished my family situation was different, too."
She buried her face into his chest. She didn't want to be understandable. She wanted to be right, but she knew she would be wrong in one way or another.
"I didn't approach you before because you were happy living the life you created for yourself," he said, changing the subject. "I didn't ever think you'd accept what I did for the Cantil and who I was. I just had this feeling you'd never be ready to get involved with someone like me. Not until I saw your face after killing that guy and stabbing my father. That's when I knew I needed to talk to you and know you."
He rubbed her shoulder and her upper back gently. It was slowly lulling her to sleep the longer he did it.
"Maybe not at first, but I'm starting to understand you now. You aren't as tough as everyone says you are." She sighed blissfully as she snuggled into the warmth that was his body.
"I'm not?" He sounded amused, but Mykie didn't move to look at him.
"No. You're a bigger puppy dog than Jered said Caspar was. You might growl and bite with others, but you know how to behave when you need to," she murmured.
"You're insinuating that I, a high-ranking member of the Cantil and one of the most feared besides Chance himself, is whipped by you?" He chuckled softly.
"Mhmm," she hummed, her eyelids getting heavier.
"You must be dreaming."
He leaned his chin on the top of her head and they fell asleep in the position. When she woke up, she was surprised to find her bed empty.
FOUR LETTERS
The house was quiet, and she got out of bed to go search for her companion. She didn't think he would leave without telling her, but he might have not had a chance if Chance called him into his office.
She walked over to the door and opened it. She was surprised to see Ryker standing on the other side with a plate balanced in one hand while his other was reaching out to open her door.
"I didn't think you'd be up yet," he explained before Mykie could form words.
She backed up from the door so he could enter her bedroom. He pulled her over to her bed gently with his free hand and set the plate on top of her comforter.
"I made breakfast for the both of us, but then I need to take off," he murmured once she had settled on her bed again.
"Where's your food?" she asked. The plate he brought in with him had a variety of food on it but in smaller helpings. There was bacon, sausages, and hash browns. He must have been standing over the stove for a while to cook all of that.
