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“I’m not scared,” she repeated, but it didn’t sound convincing this time.
“Of course not,” he said with a small grin.
“You’re making a lot of assumptions,” she murmured.
“You’re telling me that I’m wrong? That you aren’t scared of your own feelings?” He quirked his eyebrow. “Prove it to me. Tell me you’re done with me. That you don’t want to try whatever we’re doing with each other. To leave your apartment and leave you the fuck alone.”
She sat up and turned her head to look at him. She didn’t realize how close their faces would be until she was in a sitting position, but now all she could do was try to avoid breathing in his intoxicating cologne.
“Tell me to get out,” he whispered, his breath brushing across her face. “To get away from you.”
“No,” she said in a soft voice.
“Why not?” he asked. “You said you wanted to be alone. Show me you aren’t afraid to lose me. I’m all or nothing, Mykie. You might be the model of control, but I know you. You’re dying to just let go, just once. Then after you do it the first time, you’ll realize how easy that control slips.”
“I need to figure out what I want,” Mykie whispered, looking up at him through her lashes. It took everything in her not to close the distance between them and kiss him just to shut him up. The more he spoke, the more her resolve was breaking, and she risked dragging him into her bedroom and never letting go of him.
"What you want isn't going to change as soon as I walk back out the door. With you, it's 'out of sight, out of mind'. I won't let you do that to yourself or me. I've told you before, and I'll tell you again: it's only a matter of time before you start to love me as much as I love you, but I'll make time. Do you know why?"
She shook her head.
"Because I'm just as scared as you are. My entire life has been about tight control and never showing weaknesses. But you just waltzed right in and smashed my control to pieces within minutes of speaking to you." He lifted his hand to cup her cheek. "No, that's not true. Just being in the same vicinity as you tests me. From the moment you stabbed Earl and later shook his hand with no remorse as you opened your portfolio of charts, I was done for. I had to have you for myself, and nothing was going to get in my way anymore. Do you know why I wanted you?"
She felt her face burn at his words as she shook her head.
“Because you scare me. You scare me to death, Mykie Vesper, and I love you every minute for it. You make me have heart palpitations every time I open my mouth in fear of saying the wrong thing or that it will be taken wrong. But what was one of the first things I said to you?”
“Don’t think; feel,” she repeated the words back to him, tears forming in her eyes. The words were like knives in her chest, but she was finally understanding them for what they meant. Thoughts only complicated matters when the heart already made up its mind.
She closed the distance between the two of them and kissed him. She imagined that the kiss wouldn't be considered desirable, because she knew she was crying throughout the whole thing, and she was sure that there were tears that weren't hers somewhere in there. It was a kiss of pain and acceptance. It was reluctant, but painful relinquishment of control in one kiss.
Eventually, Mykie leaned back and rested her forehead on his as they each caught their breath.
“Do you still want me to leave?” he asked.
“No. You’re not allowed to leave,” she said sternly.
“I won’t even think about it, Princess,” he murmured.
FRIENDSHIP MENDED
"I already told you, you don't have to help me out," Mykie repeated for what felt like the tenth time that night as she wiped down the bar top. After she told him about the Vulture that showed up at the pub, he wouldn't let it go. Ryker offered to help her, but she refused. However, that next Friday, he gave her no choice and told her co-worker that he'd take his shift that night. To say Mykie and the other guy were surprised was an understatement.
He leaned his back against the counter with his arms crossed, so his back was facing the customers. It was still early, so not many had come in just yet. "I'm going to do it, whether you like it or not. If Chance isn’t going to take the threat seriously, I will. They aren’t just threatening him, but you as well. There are much easier ways to send Chance a message than calling you out.”
“I need to do my job, Ryker. Chance is trusting me with basically running everything up here,” she said, waving her hands around. “I can’t disappoint him.”
Ryker put his hands up. He looked at the ground and shook his head before he peered up through his eyelashes, but she could see from his lips that he was holding back a laugh. “I wouldn’t dare to get in your way. You tell me where you want me, and I’ll be there.”
“I can think of a few places,” Mykie murmured.
Ryker’s eyes were locked on hers as he moved. He stood up straight and in one fellow swoop, picked her up until she was sitting on the bar top, making her squeal. He stepped between her legs and place a hand on either side of her thighs.
He leaned in. “I don’t think I heard you right. Care to repeat that?”
“You heard exactly what I said,” she teased. “Unfortunately, you can’t do anything about it. We need to get to work. I'll stay here while you handle the tables. I don't like serving that much."
She pushed him back gently with a hand on his chest and hopped down. “Now I have to wipe the bar down again, because of you.”
