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“I hardly know him.”
“Doesn’t sound like the case to me.”
I stop arguing, recognizing that even I don’t believe what I’m saying. I’m mostly parroting those things because they sound right. As if theyshouldbe.
“I tried, really hard, not to give in to this.”
OK, maybe I didn’t trythathard.
“After last time—”
“You screwed another one of your sponsors?”
“God, no.”
Qasim is being deliberately obtuse. But I know he’s teasing now.
“You know what I’m talking about.”
“I do. And I know you’ve beaten yourself up over it for too long.” Qasim stands. “Don’t beat yourself up over this too. The heart wants what the heart wants.”
A bubble of hope wells up inside me.
“You don’t think I’m making the worst mistake of my life?”
Qasim grabs his phone from my desk and gives me a look of pity. “I didn’t say that.”
The bubble bursts.
“But I don’t think that matters now. You’ve set your sails. Now it’s time to navigate the course, my friend.”
He starts to leave, but I realize we talked about me, about Hayden, the whole time.
“I didn’t even get to ask about your weekend.”
Qasim gives me a secret smile. “It was good, but notthatgood. No worries. Gotta get back to work. Catch you later.”
“OK, and about all of this . . .”
“You don’t have to ask. It’s in the vault.”
He pretends to zip his lips and leaves.
His words still ring in my ears. He’s right, about all of it. This whole situation may be hazardous to my professional health, but the heart wants what the heart wants.
And mine wants Hayden Tanner.
28
Hayden
I’m nervous as hell.
There’s not a pretentious bone in Ada’s body. I know she’d be just as happy hanging out with a sandwich from Corner Deli in my apartment, but I don’t want her to feel like we need to stay hidden forever. Or that being cautious needs to be boring.
The car speaker hums.
“Shall I pull over, sir? Or loop around?”
