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EIGHT
JONAS
“Did you actually pay attention in body shop class, Ken? Or did you just watch videos on YouTube?”
Ken shrivels under my harsh criticism, but I don’t give a fuck. Feels as if it has taken him ten times longer than usual to replace the rear quarter panels on the sedan he’s working on.
“Jonas,” Dad barks from the door leading into the garage office. “Office. Now.” He doesn’t wait for me to answer. Just pivots on his heel and heads inside.
I throw the wrench in my hand in the general direction of the toolbox, the metal on metal clangs and echoes off the concrete walls. Just as I open my mouth to snap at Ken again, Dad hollers from the office. “Now, Jonas.”
Weaving between the cars in the bays, I head into the office. I shut the door and huff as I cross my arms. “What, Dad?” I bite out.
Dad steps up to me and points a finger in my face. “Don’t you take that tone with me, son. You may be a man, but I don’t deserve the shit coming out of your mouth.”
I flinch, not used to hearing my father speak to me in such a harsh manner. He lowers his finger, then walks over to the couch and sits down. Eyes on me, he doesn’t ask me to sit down, but his narrowed lids imply I do so. Taking a deep breath and dropping my arms, I amble over to the couch and sit.
“You need to talk to me, Jonas. I have put up with your foul mood for more than a week now. I’ve let some things skirt by because you are obviously upset. But yelling at the employees for no reason, I draw the line there.”
I rest my elbows on my knees and drop my head in my palms.Fuck, fuck, fuck.I am a goddamn mess.
The last time Autumn and I truly spoke was when I left her apartment… ten days ago. After the way we left things, I haven’t reached out. She texted once to say she missed me but left it at that. What did I say in return? Nothing. If she still wants to spend time with me, if she still wants our relationship, Autumn needs to be the one to take the leap. She needs to say something more thanI miss you. Show me some indication she wants to see or spend time together.
“Haven’t talked to Autumn in almost two weeks,” I groan. “She said things between us needed to go slower because of her ex making an appearance and filing for custody.” Beside me, Dad gasps. Not loud, but enough for me to hear. “Autumn thinks if we’re together, the ex will use our relationship against her. I don’t get her reasoning. And considering the guy ditched her before Clementine was born, I don’t think he has a leg to stand on.”
Dad pats my shoulder. “For obvious reasons, I didn’t go to law school. But after seeing how friends of ours handled divorces and custody battles, I would side with you on this. If the man has never been around, his case probably holds no weight.”
I lift my head from my hands and sit up straighter, peering over at Dad. “This is what I’ve tried to tell her. Even her attorney said to live life as she had before he showed. There has to be something she hasn’t told me. Something else about him that scares her. Which bothers me more.”
“Son, all you can do is support and be there for her. Even if it’s sporadic. If she hired a good lawyer, this will work itself out soon. And although she asked for distance, don’t keep hiding in the shadows. Reach out to her. If she doesn’t want to talk, she won’t.”
This has been one of my fears. After this much time apart and no real interaction, will she just shrug me off? She has handled this without me for more than two weeks since it all came to light. Does she need me for anything at this point?
“Dad, if she doesn’t want to talk to me… I don’t think I’ll handle that well. At all. You think the last ten days have been bad?” I shake my head and leave it at that.
“I don’t doubt it, son. But stop for a moment and put yourself in Autumn’s shoes. Imagine all the stress and uncertainty she has to deal with right now. Until not too long ago, her life was normal and boring. She went to work and spent time with her daughter. Then you came into the picture and stirred things up.” I give him the side-eye and he holds his hands up in surrender. “In a good way. But she was still adjusting to a new way of life with you, then her ex blindsides her and threatens to take away her daughter. Son, she went into protection mode. Like any good parent would do. And I attest to doing irrational things while in parent mode.”
“Okay. So, how do I insert myself into her life then? I don’t want to overwhelm her. But I want to be there. Right now, it feels as if I don’t matter. Like she could live without me.”
The more days we spend apart, the deeper the ache in my bones. I can’t seem to catch my breath. And the pain in my chest grows stronger each day. Worst of all, I get next to no sleep. So, all I have is time to think. And I just want my brain to shut the hell up. Just one night.
“Text or call her. Without too much detail, tell her how you’re feeling. Don’t make your chat a guilt-trip. Don’t make it all about you. Ask her how things are going. If she’s gotten any updates.” Dad clasps my shoulder. “Son, it’s okay to go at her pace. Just don’t lose sight of her.”
I nod.Go at her pace, but don’t lose sight of her.Got it.
We sit in the office in silence for a bit. Dad knows I am marinating on his words. Trying to absorb and digest them. Dad may not have a wall full of college degrees or any special initials after his name, but he has always been a good listener and an even better advice giver. He has the patience of a saint. Who wouldn’t after dealing with us Thompson kids?
Dad claps my shoulder and stands. “Heading back out to the garage. Stay in here as long as you need. Come back out once you’re levelheaded enough.”
“Thanks, Dad. Be back out shortly.”
Once he exits the office, I fish my phone out from my coveralls. Unlocking the phone, I open my text history with Autumn and read her last message for the millionth time.
I miss you. Same, scarlet.
I take a deep breath and poise myself to type out a text. My fingers tremble above the screen and I close my eyes and take a few more deep breaths before I type.
Jonas:Sorry I didn’t answer before. Miss you too. Terribly. How are my girls?
