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What am I not getting?
I get to my feet with the intention of pacing, moving...doing something.
Only, I stumble a little.
My hand shoots out to steady myself on the edge of the sofa and I bite my lip, trying to work out what’s wrong.
Charlie grins at me and lifts his wine glass to his lips slowly, deliberately. Fuck.
“How are you feeling, Charlotte?”
Black spots dance in front of my eyes.
“Ready for your family history lesson?”
There’s a ringing in my ears and it’s like I’m underwater. Everything is far away.
“I believe you knew my cousin; your sister certainly did...intimately.”
I shake my head in disbelief, but I’m moving in slow motion.
“Do you like your wine, Charlotte? It’s a family blend.”
I lurch towards the kitchen but it’s like wading through treacle; I’m that slow, Charlie is able to take his time getting to his feet, draining his glass and placing it purposefully on the side table, before crossing to me in a few short strides and capturing my wrists.
He pulls me against his chest in a move that could be deemed romantic or passionate to an outsider looking through the window. That’s how I feel right now: an outsider. Like all of this is happening to someone else, like I’m removed from my body and watching through a screen. It’s not me, it’s not my life, it’s a soap.
When he kisses me, I try to jerk away but he bites my lip, drawing blood. I raise my knee to hit him where it hurts but my limbs are so heavy, I’m so sluggish, that he easily blocks me.
“Tut-tut, that’s not very nice,” Charlie warns with a shake of his head. “My cousin warned me about you. I think he was half in love with you.”
What? That doesn’t make sense. I blink slowly.
“Well, in love with the idea of you, anyway,” Charlie explains. “Did you know, when we were younger, we were as thick as thieves. Best friends. We made our first kill together. Sure, it was only a goldfish, but at the age of six it was a pretty powerful feeling.”
“Who?”
“Jesus, maybe I gave you too much. You shouldn’t be this slow! Michael! Michael you stupid bitch; he’s my cousin.”
“Was,” I just about manage to correct.
That earns me a backhander across the face that sends me reeling. I stumble, but of course, he still has a tight grip on me and he easily keeps me upright.
“Why...why...school?” My tongue feels thick in my dry mouth. How is it possible that a wine which tasted so fruity has left me feeling so dry?
“Why didn’t I go to his school?” Charlie guesses my intent. “My parents freaked out the day we drowned the neighbour’s cat. Well, the day we got caught drowning the second one; even with the evidence staring them in the face, they still thought the first had run away. They decided Michael was a bad influence and sent me away to a boarding school in Switzerland.”
“Didn’t stop us though!” he brags. “Imagine being pen pals with someone who thinks like you, has the same dreams and aspirations as you. We made wonderful plans together. And when I was allowed home during the holidays, he was always there waiting for me, eager to try out our ideas.”
“Losing our virginity together was my idea. It was made more special by the fact that the girl never consented,” he laughs, and even in my hazy state I can tell he’s completely deranged.
“What...want?”
“What do I want?” he parrots back at me. “Revenge, sweetheart. Michael told me what he did to your sister. I was always so jealous that I hadn’t been there for that one. He insisted it was too good an opportunity to miss, but I always felt betrayed; our first human kill should have been together, don’t you agree?”
Bile rises into my mouth and it takes every ounce of strength I have not to pass out or puke. I feel like the temperature has increased by twenty degrees; I’m sweating with the effort of simply trying to stand up. The dizziness is overwhelming but somehow I know that I have to stay conscious, otherwise bad things will happen.
“He told me his plans for you. He was beside himself when his plans at the party were thwarted. He was determined to get you too before the end of term; he said twins would be his crowning glory. I told him pregnant twins would be the real coup.”
