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But I don’t feel them.
I’ve been entirely numb all week. I’ve not left my room - not even to go to class. Everyone thinks I’m ill and the few teachers who’ve popped in to see me could confirm it just based on how awful I look.
I’m barely eating.
I’m not sleeping.
I’m having waking nightmares of an event I don’t remember. How is that even possible?
The worst thing is, I don’t know if I’m having flashbacks, or if my twisted mind is trying to fill in the blanks with a complete fabrication of what happened that night.
If I do fall asleep, I dream of loud music and flashing lights, then a dark room and pain. I feel strong hands pinning me down and hot breath against my skin. A faintly familiar voice whispers something I can’t decipher in my ear, and I wake up shaking in a cold sweat.
No. It’s better not to sleep at all.
I just can’t.
