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“Sir,” Tadek said silkily, turning back to Siranos. “His Highness would like you to leave. Am I going to have to slip my leash?”
“It was ajoke,” Siranos said. “How is anyone supposed to have a conversation with you Arasti when you all close ranks like this the minute someone missteps?”
“Mm, I’m sure that is difficult.” Tadek smiled sympathetically. “How is anyone supposed to have a conversation with you, sir, when your tongue would be so much better suited to licking a pig’s cock?”
Evemer made a strangled noise, and all Kadou’s gratitude disappeared in a wave of horror.
Siranos gaped. “I beg yourpardon?”
“Granted,” Tadek said airily. “You’d better beg His Highness’s pardon too, though.”
“Tadek,” Evemer hissed.
“Tadek, not like that,” Kadou said. With fumbling hands, he stuffed the coin purses into his pockets.
“Whyever not? Will he have me beaten?” He leered at Siranos. “Will I have to sayoh, yes, please?”
“Control your servant’s mouth,” Siranos snapped.
“Oh,” Tadek said, drawing it out long and breathy, as if he’d been offered the most rare and succulent delicacy. “Yes,please.”
“Tadek!” Evemer snapped again. “Manners!”
“How am I being unmannerly?” Tadek asked, all innocence. “Isaidplease! What am I supposed to do, beg? I mean, if you want me to, I certainly can—”
“Excuse us,” Kadou said, taking Tadek by the arm and dragging him toward the door.
“Of course,Your Highness,” Siranos said icily. “A handful, isn’t he?”
Tadek turned back and gave him an enormous cheeky wink. “My friend, I can assure you it’s much more than one handful.”
Kadou was going to die of embarrassment. He dragged a cackling Tadek out of the room and down the hall to the other end of the house, where he shoved him into a spare room. Evemer, close behind them, slammed the door. “Tadek!” Kadou said. “What wasthat?”
Tadek had dropped his fey act. “You’re going to tell me I shouldn’t talk to him like that. Give me one good reason why not.”
Kadou was too aghast to deny it. “Because it’s rude.”
“And? He’s a bully, isn’t he? Every time he can corner you, he needles you, even when he claims he’s trying to smooth things over. What courtesy do I owe him? We can’t do anything else about him, can we, and asking him nicely to leave you the hell alone didn’t make any difference. I gave him several chances to leave graciously!”
“It was inappropriate,” Evemer intoned.
“Yes, that’s the point!” Tadek turned on him. “You tell me, then: You went tense the second Siranos stepped in the room—you’ve seen him bullying Kadou before, haven’t you?” Evemer’s expression darkened. “Ah, see, that’s what I thought. And I bet you wanted to punch him for it, didn’t you?” He put his hands on his hips, meeting Evemer’s glare without a flinch—even as tall as Evemer was, they seemed nearly of a height. Tadek had a certain presence, and sometimes appeared taller than he was. “You wanted to punch him and you couldn’t, because that would be—oh, my!—inappropriate.”
“Illegal,” Evemer growled. “Immoral.”
“Tadek, leave it alone,” Kadou said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Please leave it.”
“He’s coming at your prince with weapons,” Tadek said, his snapping hazel eyes fixed on Evemer. “Weapons which, unless I’m much mistaken, you don’t have proficiency to counter. I do. I know bullies. I know how to put them in their place. If he’d really meant to make up with His Highness, he could have started withI’m sorry.”
“You won’t win against him,” Kadou said, catching his arm again and forcing Tadek to look at him.
“I don’thaveto win against him,” Tadek said, exquisitely patient, as if explaining a very simple mathematical concept to two people who were deliberately refusing to understand. “I just have to distract him long enough foryouto make a graceful exit. That’s my job, isn’t it? Protecting you! You can’t go down into the gutter with him, because you’re—well, you! Even if you weren’t the prince, you wouldn’t lower yourself like that. Lovely,” he said, holding Kadou by the arms and giving him his most charming smile. “Beauty, I wasbornin the gutter.” Kadou wriggled free of his grip; Tadek let go immediately, sighed.
“Please,” Kadou said firmly. “Figure out a different way to deal with him. Her Majesty wants a good relationship with him, and with me, and so I—I shouldn’t have let that happen. We all took offense much too quickly, and he wasright—we did close ranks on him. He was trying to repair things between us, and I ought to have listened to him, at the very least.” Kadou’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Besides that, you baiting him like that isn’t going to make Her Majesty any more inclined to forgive you.”
Tadek raised his eyes to the heavens. “I don’t know how else to explain to you that I don’t care about the consequences if it means I can put myself between you and whatever arrows that man shoots at you.”
May Usmim show leniency at the hour of judgment, but Evemer found himself agreeing withTadek,of all people. He was right—it wasn’t proper or appropriate in the slightest, but it did seem to be the only effective way to stop Siranos in his tracks. The absolute shock on his face when Tadek had opened his mouth for that filth . . .
