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I simply leaned into him, reaching up to press my lips against his and to wrap my arm around his neck. Like a normal man, he relaxed into it, kissing me back so sweetly, parting his lips when my tongue teased the seam, begging for entrance. This man felt so right in my arms, like he was perfectly made to fit me. My hand found his chest, my fingers splayed for balance, and I stretched a little more.
He let me. This was my kiss, and he didn't take over, didn't demand control. He just let me have it. Zeal's tongue danced with mine. His mouth moved in time, but he didn't pull me closer. His hands didn't even move. The god was simply accepting his due.
I pulled back quickly, terrified I'd just overstepped my place. "I'm sorry."
"What?" he asked.
"I..." And I turned, unable to leave the room because that would mean shoving him aside. "I don't know what I was thinking. I forgot you're not a man, and I just - "
I groaned, realizing howstupidI was. Zeal was agod.He needed me to remind people to believe. His nature was temptation. His flirtation was a part of what he was, not something I should take personally. No different than when I was with a patron. The goal was to entice, seduce, and supply the desire. It was always one-sided. The priestess to the patron, the god to the priestess.
"I'm sorry," I breathed. "I was distracted by the temptation."
But when I turned back, he still hadn't moved. Zeal had only lifted his hand to touch his lips and he looked lost in thought. "Did you mean that?" he asked.
I nodded. "I'm sorry. You're beautiful, and considerate, and..."
He didn't let me figure out what came next. "I've never been kissed before," he said, his voice filled with wonder. "I've kissed, butI'vealways done the kissing." And a little smile flickered across his lips. "No one has been brave enough to kiss me first."
"I should've asked," I admitted.
And his eyes slowly lifted to lock on me. "No," he said, taking the two steps to close the distance between us. "You read that perfectly."
Without slowing, Zeal wrapped one arm around my back and fell onto my bed, pulling me down on top of him. I gasped, not expecting that, but his hand caught the side of my face and his mouth followed. This time, the kiss wasn't gentle. It wasn't passive, either. Zeal lay below me, but he still managed to take complete control.
So I slid my hand up his arm, feeling the swell of his bicep as I guided his hand over his head. My fingers moved to the bend in his elbow, then wrapped around his forearm, enjoying the strength in his body, until I reached his palm, and our hands twined together. I knew I couldn't hold him down, but he didn't care. His fingers curled around mine, holding my hand so tightly.
Because Zeal was used to taking, not being taken. There was something so amazing about feeling someone who couldn't resist their desire. Someone willing to demand. I loved it when Wraythe treated me like this, and I'd finally realized what my god had just said. He'd neverbeenkissed. He'd never had anyone want him so much they'd been willing to take the risk.
Except me. Now, I had him at my mercy. This beautiful, perfect specimen. This man who gently spoiled me. This god who'd made me his. Leaning over him, I kissed deeper, exploring his mouth, letting my free hand slide along the perfect expanse of his body. I kissed him with the enthusiasm I'd had as a teenager, with the knowledge of a woman, and with the need of his possession. I kissed this man until I was breathless.
And then he pushed, rolling me onto my back, just to hover over me. "It seems there is a reward for resisting temptation after all. It's so much sweeter when I finally give in." He leaned closer, his lips brushing against my ear. "This is what I meant when I said I wanted a partner. I just wanted to make sure you're ready."
"I'm ready," I told him.
He kissed that soft spot beneath my ear. "I am still not a man, Nariana. I want you in a way that I've never wanted anything before, but that means I need to be patient. Just knowing you think of me as more than power is all I need. Besides, you do have a test to study for, and I assure you that I know my Paths better than anyone else."
He shifted his weight, preparing to lean back, but I caught his arm. "What do you mean you're not a man?"
Because I'd seen him naked, and even as a god, he had all the right parts - yet he was blatantly slowing me down. Some aspect of his divinity clearly mattered, and I was hoping he'd tell me what.
He paused. "A man would love your body." He turned his hand, offering me help from the bed. "A god loves your soul. It's a powerful thing, and one that not everyone can handle. I have no intention of rushing you." A devious smile touched his lips. "Your first time should be special, after all. Mostly because I wouldn't want it to be our last."
"As if that doesn't sound ominous," I grumbled.
"Trust me," he said, helping me stand, which pulled me up against his chest.
I let my hands slide over his shirt. "I do. I'm just hoping that's not the last time I get to kiss you."
"That," he assured me, "willnotbe the last time I have my mouth on you."
Chapter 38
Nariana
Studying with Zeal after kissing him was harder than expected. Still, he had a way of making sure I actually focused on the subject even while curled up against him. Having a god whisper his explanations in my ear, pitched in the velvet rumble of his voice, made it the kind of thing I'd never forget.
Which was why I received an excellent on my Service of Others mid-year exam. I passed my grappling course with a good as well. When it came to my classes for the Path of the Body, my grades varied from excellent to fair, but only because Oryll was looking for a reason to drop my score. The guys did better, receiving nothing below a good.
