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I miss summer. My flowy dresses and my bare feet. They’ve grown strong running on the rough, hot pavement to the park everyday this summer. Now I’m dressed as a doll and feel ridiculous, but my parents wanted me to look presentable on my first day.
It smells like scrambled eggs and toast as I walk down the hall. My dad sits at the kitchen table with a pair of his oversized glasses perched on his nose. A cup of coffee sits on the table, steam rising from the dark liquid. I don’t know how he can drink that stuff all the time. He let me try it once, it tasted like dirt.
My dad lowers his newspaper from his face, folding it over in the middle as he looks at me. “Well, don’t you look beautiful this morning. Are you ready for your first day?”
I adjust the straps on my backpack, feeling the jiggly feeling in my stomach again. “I’m nervous.”
A frown lowers the corners of his lips. He presses the newspaper against the table, and it crinkles against his hand. He stands up, walking around our small round table and stops in front of me. His bare hands are hot as he grips my shoulders, probably from his coffee cup, his fingers digging into my tense skin as he gives me a squeeze. “What? What would you be nervous about? You’ll do great!”
“Are we going to stay here a while?” I ignore his question and go to one of my own. I don’t want to get comfortable here if he plans to pack us up in a year and move to an entirely new place where I’ll have to start all over.Again.
His frown pulls lower, his lips almost hitting his chin as he takes a step back. He smells like coffee and marijuana.
My parents smoke pot, and they say there’s nothing wrong with it. It’s always been a way of living for them.
“Well, I imagine we’ll be here a while. Why?” He sits back down and picks up his coffee cup, taking a slurpy sip. He winces when the hot liquid touches his tongue.
I take a deep breath. “We keep moving everywhere. I want to just stay somewhere. I’m tired of having to make new friends every couple of years.”
His face softens, the small wrinkles that have formed on his skin the last few years smooth out as he looks at me sadly. “Sometimes grownups have to move when a job opportunity comes up for them. So, I’m not saying it’s not going to happen again, but I will say that I’ll do my best to keep us here. Do you like it here?”
I nod.
He smiles as he picks up his paper. “I thought so. Don’t worry about the future, Luna. Don’t worry at all. Just go and have some fun. And have a great day at school.”
My mom bustles out of her bedroom at that moment, her long hair trailing behind her back, and another one of her flowing dresses fluttering behind her. It always looks like a soft wave follows her.
“Come on, Luna. You’re going to be late.”
I smile at my dad when he makes a funny face behind my mom’s back. Snickering, I head to the door when she calls my name. “Luna!”
I turn around and watch as she grabs a piece of toast, and an apple from the fruit bowl on the counter. “I know you’ll be eating breakfast at school, but you should still try and eat something at home.”
I grab them from her with a smile, the nerves making eating impossible at this point.
She brushes my black hair from my face and bends down to give me a kiss on the cheek. Her lipstick makes her lips stick to me, and she licks her thumb before swiping away the smear of pink on my skin. I frown.
“Have a great day. Don’t forget you start ballet tonight. We still have to go buy you a new pair of slippers after school.”
That puts a genuine smile on my face. I can’t wait to get back into dance. I stopped last spring when we started looking for a new place to live, and I’ve been so ready to get back into it. “Okay!” I rush out the doorbefore she can stop me for anything else and stop in my tracks right when I see the sight in front of me.
The toe of my shoes presses into the grass as I screech to a halt, and the week roots split from the ground with the force.
“Whoa,” Roman says from in front of me. He takes a step toward me to make sure I’m okay, but second-guesses his movements and stops in place. “Are you all right?”
“What’re you doing here?” I ask, then feel immediately bad when Nora frowns next to him. Roman doesn’t flinch, though; he only continues to stare at me.
“My mom asked Harper if she would be okay bringing us to school, since she’s heading that way anyway.”
My eyebrows lift and I look over at Harper who’s picking at her nails. She can sense the heat of my stare and looks up at me. “Can we go yet?”
Nora walks up to me, her rainbow backpack shiny and new. “Nice backpack,” I say, because it is.
“Thanks.” She lifts her lunchbox. “I’ve got a matching lunchbox.” It’s metal and square and looks awesome.
“Cool.”
We all start walking to school, down the dirt road and along the cornfield. The tassels of the cornstalks blow in the wind and crunch as the dried leaves crack against each other. The air is cool this morning, the slight bite of fall making its appearance early. Or maybe it isn’t early, and this is just how Wisconsin does things. I don’t know.
