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It was a different kind of shower pep talk. While growing up, I’d broken down in the shower more times than I’d like to admit. I’d cried there to hide my pain. I’d talked myself into simply surviving. Making it until I was old enough to get out.
Now, I had the power and the capability of setting my standards higher. I no longer needed just to survive, I could start thinking about enjoying my life. I deserved happiness, love, and support. As did all the people in Wolf Creek who couldn’t stand up for themselves.
By the time I was finished in the shower, I was feeling renewed. Sure, I was tired from the run, and my emotions were still a messy roller coaster, but I felt like I deserved more than I’d let myself hope for.
Tyler was broken, but his kind of broken caused more damage. Aside from the occasional flicker of sympathy or sadness, mostly I felt relief. I wasn’t sure what it said about me that I wasn’t mourning my mate. Or feeling guilt about his death. I doubted he’d felt any sensation of loss after trapping me in the cave to die. I wondered if that made me just as terrible as him.
Dressed in one of the random white button-down shirts, I crept from the yellow room into the hall. It was late, and I’d dismissed myself without discussion around any other plans. I wasn’t sure if the others were sleeping and didn’t want to wake anyone. It had been a big day and shifting took a lot out of us.
The one thing that was different, though, was that I wasn’t feeling the same insatiable need for sex. Maybe it was the life-or-death situation that immediately followed the shift. It was a little unsettling, but I wasn’t going to argue. It was probably a blessing that I was able to resist Alec tonight while I worked through everything.
Voices carried from the kitchen. I made my way there and found Alec and Kyle sitting at the table. The two males looked like they were having a serious conversation but stopped talking the second they noticed me.
“Should I go?” I asked.
Kyle stood. “Actually, I was just leaving.” He walked toward me and stopped right in front of me. “You know I have your back, no matter what.”
If that wasn’t clear before today, it was crystal clear now. Kyle had sided with me, and defended me, over Tyler. I wasn’t sure why it hadn’t struck me at how dramatic that was until just now. “I know, today had to be hard for you.”
He shook his head. “I thought it might be, but it wasn’t. The more distance I got from the abuse of Wolf Creek, the more my eyes were opened.”
“I’m lucky to have you,” I said.
He gave me a smile and patted my shoulder as he left the kitchen. It was a short conversation, but it spoke volumes. Kyle was a survivor, like me. While he’d been part of the wolves who were accepted, he likely experienced things that were unpleasant. Wolf Creek left its mark on all of us.
I walked over to the table and took the seat across from Alec. I wasn’t sure I could trust my libido if I was too close to him. It was still so strange not having a physical response to the shift.
“In case you’re wondering, Kyle promised me he’d kill me if I hurt you,” Alec said. His tone was serious, but his smile eased the tension.
“Is that so?” I raised my brows. “Should I be concerned that you’re going to hurt me?”
He reached his hand across the table and took hold of mine. “I am going to be making amends for what I did to you for the rest of my life. But I swear to you, I will never do anything to cause you pain again.”
Warmth spread from the point of contact, traveling up my arm, across my chest, and down all the way to my center. I sucked in a surprised breath and pulled my hand away.
Alec moved his hand and his brow furrowed, an expression of disappointment on his face.
“It wasn’t your words, it was your touch,” I admitted. “I don’t know how I’m going to wait. Every time we touch, I can feel the desire to complete the bond.”
“It’ll get stronger the longer we wait,” he said. “But you already know that.”
“What does this mean for us?” I asked. “You and me, there was always something there, but a bond is so unexpected.”
“I know. We have to be the luckiest shifters alive,” he said. “I’ve never met anyone who got a second chance.”
“I kept thinking the fates made a mistake when they paired me with Tyler, but what if it was to help me find you?” My cheeks heated. It felt so cheesy to say those words, but they came out before I could think them through.
“I’ve been wondering that myself,” he said. “It sure was a fucked-up way for us to find each other.”
I laughed. “That’s an understatement.”
“I know you’ve got a lot on your plate now and I’m not going anywhere.” Alec reached for my hand again and gave it a quick squeeze before releasing it.
“Thanks.”
“Why don’t you get some rest. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a wild ride,” he said.
I couldn’t argue with that. Spencer had given us so little information and I had no idea what to expect. All I knew was that tomorrow I was supposed to steal a crown and depose a king.
My life was so fucking weird.
