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“In some regard, yes. I don’t want to be tied to any one thing. Once upon a time I thought that’s what I wanted. To share my life with someone I love, to bear his children, to watch them grow with him by my side. But things change, and as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that’s not the life I want anymore.”
“Because you don’t believe in love?” We slow to a stop at the tail end of my car and I release my hold on her, turning so we’re standing face to face.
“I know I say I don’t believe in love. That it’s nothing more than a chemical reaction in the brain, but that’s not really true. I know love exists, no matter what or why it happens. But I don’t want to love anyone. I don’t want to give someone my heart to have them hand it back to me in pieces. And I also don’t want to be responsible for someone else’s happiness. It’s too much pressure. Life’s too short.”
“So you’re afraid?”
“I’m not afraid,” she snips, her tone growing defensive. “I just don’t like love. And I don’t think it’s something I need to feel satisfied in life, no matter what anyone else says.”
“You hate love.” I smile, trying to lighten the mood that suddenly feels too heavy.
“I don’t hate love. It’s just not for me.”
“Look, I get it. I’m not one of those people in love with the idea of being in love. I like my independence as much as the next guy, but when it’s all said and done love is all we have. The people we love and the people who love us back. That’s all we get in this life. We can’t take anything else with us when our time here is done.”
“Who are you and what have you done with the arrogant prick I know as Harris Avery.”
“Maybe this is who I am. Maybe you only saw what you wanted to see.”
“Or maybe I saw whatyouwanted me to see,” she challenges, the smile on her lips telling me we’ve entered safer territory.
“How else was I gonna win you over?”
“So that was your plan?” She laughs. “Forgive me for saying it, but I think you need to reevaluate your game.”
“Why would I do that? I’m here with you now, aren’t I?”
“I guess you’ve got me there.” She rolls her eyes, crossing to the passenger side of the car. “Are you going to take me home now or are we going to sit here and talk about your weak ass game for the next thirty minutes.”
“I’ll show you weak ass game.” I start running toward her.
She squeals and throws open the car door, jumping inside as I reach her.
“You think the car is going to protect you?” I cock my head, a wicked smile on my face.
“Harris.” She swats at me as I climb on top of her, knocking the recline lever with my foot as I do. The seat instantly drops back.
“Now, what were you saying about my game?” I pull the door shut before pressing my weight down on top of her.
“That it sucks.” She giggles.
“You weren’t saying it sucked earlier,” I remind her, lowering my face until our lips are a mere inch apart. “Perhaps you need a reminder.” I press a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth.
“Harris.” Her breathing changes when she feels my erection harden against her stomach. “We’re in a packed parking lot. People can see.”
“Then let them watch,” I murmur as my lips brush across the side of her neck. Her skin’s so soft I nearly groan. Fuck me.
“Shut up.” She presses on my shoulders with both hands. “We are not having sex here.”
“Why not? You scared?” I challenge.
“No.” She swallows.
“You are.” I pull back to meet her gaze.
“I’ll show you scared.” She moves to sit up but my weight is holding her in place.
“Where do you think you’re going?” I smile.
