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Thursday
Junewokeupin pain.
“Fuck,” she mumbled into the pillow as her stomach clenched. Colin was dead asleep, his hair halfway out of his bun, facing away from June. She barely had a moment to admire the way he slept before another cramp coursed through her stomach. She clenched her teeth, curled up into a ball and tried to will away the pain. Muir gave an offended meow as she had accidentally kicked him in her movements. “Fuck,” she muttered again, feeling sweat prickle on her forehead. A wave of sensation floated through her body, accompanied by the realization that June had to shit. Immediately.
She scrambled out of Colin’s bed, blindly grabbing for her phone and fumbling to turn the flashlight on. She stepped over their clothes and shoes, hastily tossed on the floor, as she tried to remember how to find the bathroom. She wrenched the door open and flung herself on the toilet and unloaded.
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. June thought as she held her head in her hands. This was not sexy, and it was definitely going to smell and good god, she hoped she didn’t need a plunger.
“June?” Her stomach dropped as she heard Colin’s voice from the bedroom. No, no, no, he could not see her like this. June wasn’t shy about bodily functions, but this was definitely crossing some sort of line. To have this happen less than five hours after fucking? Not fair. This was the cherry on top of the pile of shit that was this entire school year.
Literally.
“June, are you okay?” June squeezed her eyes shut and prayed to every deity she knew of that Colin would just roll over and go back to sleep. Apparently, however, every deity was asleep at the moment, because she heard Colin’s feet pad out of the bedroom and toward where she was. Shit, she had turned on the light and he could probably see it from the crack at the bottom of the door. At least she had had the semblance of mind to close the door. There would have been no coming back from that.
June froze, still on the toilet, as she saw the shadow of Colin's feet from under the door. She took a moment, in all of the horror of this, to acknowledge that he had slipped his feet into his well-loved slippers, something that had a small bit of warmth blossom in her heart.
“June?” Colin said against the door.
“In here,” she replied, meekly.
“Are you okay? Did you barf? Do you need water or a ginger ale or something? I can come in and hold your hair if you need me to.”
“Do not come in!” June shrieked, louder than she intended.
“O-okay,” he said, hesitant. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah,” she sighed. “It’s the other end. I’m mortified and you can just go somewhere else and I’ll find a way to flush myself down the toilet and you’ll never have to see me again.”
She heard Colin laugh through the door, a soft chuckle that had June lifting up her head and looking at the door as if she could see through it. She imagined the side of his mouth flicking up slightly, his eyes going soft.
“June, you’re fine. Everybody poops.”
“Yeah, but it’s soooo not sexy,” June moaned.
“June, I’ve lived on camps for over a decade. The food here will wreck your system if you’re not used to it.”
“I’ve been hungry,” June continued to whine. “And it’s so tasty and I hate cooking so it’s so nice to have unlimited food.”
“June, I’ve dealt with so many poop stories, seriously, this is nothing.” June didn’t say anything, so he continued. “Okay, so my first year working at camp, I was in the cabin and we found a turd in the shower. Just a full turd. And no one owned up to it. Mystery turd.” June huffed out a laugh, imagining a young Colin trying to figure out which kid had shit in the shower.
“I’ve got more. Another year, a kid shit in the shower and tried to smash it down the drain.”
“Oh my god, that is horrifying!” June said, laughing louder.
“Okay, here’s another one and it doesn’t involve showers,” Colin said. June saw his shadow under the door shift and he sat down outside the door. “So one summer, I was at a different camp in the midwest, just for a summer, and we had a sewer system. A thunderstorm came through camp and knocked out the power and, because it’s a camp and they’re underfunded, we only had one backup generator. So we had to make the decision to either keep the kitchen refrigerator and freezer on - which contained thousands of dollars of food - or we would keep the sewer on. The director made the decision to save all of the food, so none of the toilets could flush.”
“No!”
“Yes,” Colin replied solemnly. “June, I don’t know if you know how much kids shit at camp, but it is so. Much. So it just kept piling up and piling up and we had to triage which bathrooms that kids could use and make sure they weren’t sneaking in.”
“Okay, okay,” June said, laughing so much her stomach cramps were beginning to be replaced with pain from her abs cramping from laughing. “Okay, that’s the worst poop story, I get it.”
“I’m not even done,” Colin interjected. June gasped. “Okay, so finally, they fixed all the electrical problems and I’m the assistant on duty that night, so it was my job to go around to every single toilet on camp and make sure they flushed. And figure out a way to make them flush if they were…uh…blocked.” June kept giggling, her laughter echoing and bouncing around the tiny bathroom, slipping out to Colin under the door.
“I still haven’t figured out how to put that on my resume,” he finished with a dramatic sigh. June ripped a piece of toilet paper to wipe the tears that had begun to gather at her eyes from laughing. Colin went quiet, the only sounds the last hiccups of June’s laughter.
She took a moment to realize that he was comforting her as she sat, bare ass, on the toilet after shitting her brains out. This was a level of kindness and intimacy that was incredibly unexpected, and touched June’s heart in a way that was better than any homemade chicken noodle soup if she was sick with the flu.
