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I shook my head. "No. I'm not uncomfortable... I'm just... It's just... different."
His entire body froze, becoming completely solid.
"Different as in new?" He asked hesitantly. "As in, new undiscovered territory? That kind of different?"
Oh boy.
This was not a conversation I was interested in having. Not at all. But, at the same time, it wasn't one I would shy away from. If you couldn't talk about sex and what it would mean for you to be intimate in that way with another person, then you probably shouldn't be having sex in the first place. Not that I thought Dash wanted to have sex with me or anything. At least, not right now.
Oh boy, was right. I felt my face heat up. Did I want to have sex with Dash?
"Ariel, are you alright?"
No, no and no. I was not alright. I had been having a good time, headed towards maybe and even better time, and I had to go and overthink and put a stop to it for no reason outside of the fact that I was probably a crazy person.
"I'm fine," I lied. And then, for some crazy reason, I told him a scary bit of truth. "Just nervous. You make me nervous. I mean, not you, but... No, that's not right. You don't make me nervous. It's the touching that makes me nervous. But not in a bad way. Just a nervous way. I uhh, you know what I mean." I stammered.
You know what I mean? I needed duct tape for my own damn mouth sometimes. It was highly likely Dash had no idea what I meant. He'd been a bit of a lady’s man, and had slept with a whole slew of females before me. Inexperienced probably wasn't something he was used to. Or awkward. Or people who stammered while trying to explain the obvious.
How did I ruin this so badly? Was it a gift on my part? I hoped not. I figured it probably was, that I would have a knack for ruining good things.
Since I was on a roll, I figured I might as well go for broke and put it all out there, put myself out there. Even if it did make things far more awkward, I had to do it.
"Does it bother you to know that I'm a virgin?" I asked in a rush. "When, you know, you're anything but. Does my inexperience bother you?"
Yup, that wasn't awkward or anything at all.
Word vomit, thy name is Ariel Kimber.
He slid his hand out from underneath mine and rolled his body into me so that he was half laying on top of me with his upper body looming over me.
He leaned his face in towards mine and his gray eyes sparkled.
"Sometimes with the way you stand up for yourself with the guys, I forget just how sweet you are." he said in a quiet, gentle voice. "If you remember, I like sweet things, and I really like that you're sweet. And, Ariel, it's okay to not be experienced. No one is expecting anything from you that you don’t want to give. We will take things at your pace, and if something makes you uncomfortable, all you have to do is say so, and we'll stop. That goes for all of them, I swear, they will stop when you say it's time to stop."
He leaned further down and rubbed his nose against mine. His eyes were so close it was hard to focus on them. My breath caught in my throat and my chest rose high at the intensity I saw staring down at me from his burning gaze. There was a fierce possession in there and a happy light.
"I didn't think you were a virgin," he murmured, and his hot breath caressed my lips in gentle kiss. "I honestly hadn't thought to ask, and it wouldn't have mattered to me either way. But, knowing it now? I like it. And not just for me but for all of us. I don't care who gets there first, I just like knowing that it will be one of us and only one of us. One of my brothers. Yeah, I like that a lot."
My eyes widened at his words and the heat behind them.
To be honest, I hadn't thought much about the reality of what it would mean for me to have a relationship with seven guys. Eventually, sex would be involved. With all of them. But not at the same time with all of them. Right? Probably?
My face burned.
Why hadn't I thought about the logistics before this?
"Am I embarrassing you?" He asked me sweetly, and he sounded like the answer was incredibly important to him.
I shook my head and my nose rubbed back and forth against his as I did because he hadn't backed up an inch.
"No," I whispered. "I'm not embarrassed. I guess I just hadn't really thought about..." my voice trailed off and I shrugged weakly.
His teeth flashed as he grinned. "Sex?" He said. "You hadn't really thought about sex?" When I shook my head again, he asked, "With just me or with any of us?"
I wanted to not answer him, but I refused to be a coward about this. "Any of you," I croaked out through a suddenly dry throat and lips. I licked my dry lips, and if it he'd been any closer my tongue would have brushed against his lips.
"Yeah," he said smugly, "sweet."
