Page 60 of My Wicked Virgin
ADDISON
After the funeral, I head home alone. Chase couldn’t even meet my eye when he muttered that he needed some time before coming back to the house, and Drake followed him after promising he’d keep an eye on him.
Willow decided to spend the night with Janice, though I think it was more for Janice’s sake than Willow’s. I guess it took a crisis for me to see where Chase gets his need to fix everything. It’s clear she’s worried about both Chase and Willow, but she’s been running around taking care of everyone this week. I’m concerned for when she no longer has others to care for and the loss finally hits her. She invited me to stay with them as well, but as hard as it is to be on my own, it’s almost harder to force a smile around others right now.
I’m not sure I’ve ever felt more dejected than I do as I walk through the door by myself. This isn’t even my home, technically. I thought it might be someday. I thought I was settling in and it would be the home I raise my son in, at least for a little while. But now... Now, I don’t know anything anymore.
In an effort to not let the heaviness of the day get to me, I keep myself busy tidying up. It’s better than sitting around and sulking as I wait for Chase to make it home. By the time I finish cleaning the kitchen and putting away a load of laundry, my feet are aching, and I’d give just about anything for a foot massage. Instead, I settle for a shower, my mind whirling with how I should handle things with Chase.
As much as I wish I could be understanding and give him space, I’m not sure how much more of this silent treatment I can take. Enough is enough. I know he’s hurting, but that also doesn’t give him the right to hurt me. So I decide that when he comes home tonight, I’ll try to talk to him. The timing isn’t great, but I also don’t think I can keep doing this for much longer.
But even after I’m out of the shower and dressed, Chase still isn’t home. The sun is already starting to set, so I choose to wait him out on the couch. Needing the comfort, I put on his gigantic hoodie and a mindless reality show I can lose myself in. The hours tick by just about as slowly as time can move.
By the second episode, I give in and call him. He doesn’t answer.
By the third, I’m checking my phone every few minutes, worry forming in the pit of my stomach.
By the fourth, I’m calling Drake.
“Hey, Addi,” he answers. “What’s going on?”
His voice is scratchy with sleep and I immediately feel bad. “Did I wake you?”
“Nah, you’re fine. Is everything okay?”
“Chase hasn’t come home yet.” I drag the words out reluctantly, as if keeping them in will stop them from being true. “And he isn’t answering his phone either. I assumed he was still with you.”
“Shit. He isn’t. We hung out for a few hours, just shootin’ the shit, and then he said he was tired and wanted to head home. But that was hours ago. It’s not like him to be out this late.”
“I know, but he hasn’t been himself much at all lately.” I pause, my mind reeling over where he could be and what he could be doing. Drake’s right, this isn’t like him, but nothing he’s done these past few days have been very Chase-like. And that scares me more than anything. Up until three days ago, I would have said Chase was the most trustworthy man I know, but now my brain is considering any and every possible reason for his absence.
“I’ve been worried about that,” Drake says. “Things have seemed off between you two, but I didn’t want to butt in.”
“He’s been distant, and...”
“A dickhead,” he adds at my hesitation.
I want to laugh, but I don’t have it in me. “Yeah, I guess that about sums it up. He’s all but pretending I don’t exist. Whenever I try to initiate conversation, I get the cold shoulder.”
He makes a thoughtful sound in his throat. “Things are hard for all of us right now, so I’ve just been giving him his space. I didn’t know things had gotten this bad, though.” There’s movement on the line, a rustling of fabric like he’s putting a shirt on. “You want me to go see if he went into work? Maybe he fell asleep or something. Or maybe he’s at Rudy and Janice’s.”
Even as he gives me the excuse, I know he doesn’t believe it. There’s no way Chase would have fallen asleep at work, and his recent hermit behavior wouldn’t have landed him at his parents’ house. But I try to pretend it could be possible, letting my mind cling to the explanation in place of the panic. It’s better than picturing him out there with someone else. Or worse, hurt.
“Drake, I can’t ask you to do that. It’s so late. I’m sure he’ll come home soon.”
“You’re not asking. I’m offering.” I hear a jingle of keys followed by a slamming door a few moments later. “I’ll call you soon, okay? Try not to worry too much. I’m sure everything is fine.”
* * *
Everything is not fine. I realize that about thirty minutes after I hang up with Drake, knowing he should have already arrived at Prescott Enterprises, and if Chase was there and okay, one of them probably would have called me by now. Another forty-five minutes after that, lights are shining into the living room window.
I take a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. It takes a good five minutes until I hear the front door slam shut and Chase’s heavy boots pounding against the flooring as he stomps into the living room. I war between wanting to pretend I haven’t been worried sick and wanting him to know just how much his actions are affecting me.
“Did you send Drake after me?” he roars.
I’m so taken aback that it takes me a second to process what’s happening. His eyes are hard, accusing, and their wrath is focused directly at me.
“What?” I ask, shaking my head. “I was worried about you. You weren’t answering your phone, and I—”