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Blaise
Listening to the soft sounds of whimpers and sniffles, I stared hard in front of me. Directly at the large photograph resting next to the casket awaiting to be lowered into the recently dug hole. The picture was of my best friend.
Fucking Owen. Of course, he had to leave me all alone in this terrible world. After years of being together in service, it all ended in a flash. What a crock of shit. Seeing his smug expression in that photograph made my body feel heavier from the loss.
No matter how much pain medication they pumped me with to keep up with my own injuries, there was no way in hell I’d miss the funeral. Not in my life. I had to fight tooth and nail to give one final goodbye.
Above us, gray clouds filled the sky. I couldn’t even feel surprised. Who ever had a funeral on a sunny day? It just wouldn’t fit the scene. At least if the rain started falling, everyone would have a slight distraction away from reality. I wished for a downpour.
While those around me cried, I didn’t budge. Like a statue, I appeared nearly lifeless. I didn’t feel sad. Instead, a rage filled me down to my very core. One that wouldn’t be sedated any time soon. Not while I blamed myself for his death. Each crushing wave of despair was a little reminder.
If it weren’t for me being careless, then maybe I wouldn’t be sitting at a funeral today. Even now, my hands were curled around the handles of the wheelchair I was glued in. Now wasn’t the time to make a scene. I’d remind myself of the fact as many times as I had to.
Next to me, a woman sat hunched over with her attention forward. While her eyes were tear-filled, she seemed just as quiet. With color drained out of her face, she experienced sorrow like the rest of the people here. One look at her in even my medicated haze, I knew who she had to be.
Analise Tanner. Owen’s sister. The only member of his family who he’d spoken more than enough about during our time of being deployed. The guy never shut up about her. He spoke all about how once he got to go home, he was going to take good care of her. Give her the kind of life they deserved growing up.
Analise was the one person on his mind while he took his last few desperate breaths before submitting to the kiss of death.
Once I got a look at her, I struggled to pull my eyes away. She was definitely younger than Owen, yet, I’d consider calling the two of them twins. A few differences here and there, but the similarities were uncanny. Definitely siblings.
My heart ached while looking at her when I had to fight against the urge to not see him on her warped expression. On the tip of my tongue, an apology. I owed her that at least. Right now, my throat felt tight and my tongue was swollen. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to speak if I tried.
As if feeling my stare, she looked in my direction and nearly knocked the breath out of me. I had to admit, Owen wasn’t as pretty.
Her eyes reminded me of dark chocolate, looking absolutely bitter on this awful day. Her hair was a bright shade of amethyst. From the black roots peeking through, I could tell it had been some time since she last changed the color. I heard all about the different colors she chose every few months.
Now wasn’t the time to go appreciating her appearance.
“You were the guy with him, weren’t you?” Her question came out slow, sounding raw with emotion. Even hushed as a whisper, I heard her words loud and clear.
The thought of remembering that day made my stomach clench up and threaten to spill my breakfast from earlier. With the way I looked, the answer was obvious. I guess I wasn’t ready to face that day yet.
“Something like that,” I mumbled with a growing frown. I hadn’t prepared for any sort of interview.
When Analise suddenly sent a light smile in my direction, it felt like a slap to my face. To make it even worse, she thanked me in a soft whisper. She wasn’t there with us when I lost my leg. If she knew better, she wouldn’t waste her breath giving me any undeserved appreciation.
Her hand reached out to cover mine. Fingertips brushing against the back of my hand, my entire body tingled at her touch. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt such gentleness. I didn’t deserve any of it. As she wrapped her fingers around my hand, I refused to let myself enjoy the contact.
My head pounded as she continued speaking, I closed my eyes in hope of relieving the pain. There was simply too much noise going on around, I couldn’t think. Knowing damn well I was being rude to the young woman, I couldn’t help it. I felt overwhelmed, like I couldn’t breathe.
Maybe I was more upset than I originally thought. Analise wasn’t making it any easier as she continued to be so nice.
The funeral wasn’t the only reason why I’d come to the small town. I had another task burning at the back of my mind. A task involving the woman sitting next to me.
I made a promise to Owen. One that I wasn’t even sure if I could keep if I couldn’t even have a conversation with her.
Protect her. Even through his raspy breaths, my best friend had made it clear. Owen trusted me enough with the task. I had to find his sister and protect her at all costs. If only I knew what I would get into when I agreed to such a desperate plea.
Unlike Owen, I hadn’t died that day. The wheelchair I sat in reminded me too well enough of the fact. Instead of my life being taken away, pieces of me were missing. Mentally and physically, I was no longer a complete person.
How in the hell was I supposed to care for someone I didn’t know? Someone who knew nothing about me? Was I expected to pack up my life and move to this small hardly known town? With everything going on, I didn’t know what in the hell I was going to be doing with my life.
Never being the type to show emotion too well, I didn’t know what to do with such strong feelings. The rage bubbling in my chest left me wanting to scream out in frustration. All I could do was clench my jaw and keep my thoughts inside.
I had no right to be angry that I’d been left alone in the world. Not when the woman sitting next to me had been unfairly put in the same position.
Analise Tanner. What a mess I had gotten myself into.
Owen shouldn’t have died alone. I wished I could have gone with him. Even now, I craved a release from this never ending punishment.
“I’m going to heal,” I started up, interrupting her. Meeting her gaze, I blinked away the haze. “When I am able, I’ll come back for you.”
I didn’t have the energy to solve her puzzled expression. Eventually, she’d understand what my words meant. When the time came, I’d be able to keep my promise to my best friend.
