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“My guess? They probably just fall behind or under the dryer. ”
Her eyes narrow.
“Or maybe they vanish to a mysterious land,” I add with a smile.
Her eyes soften and she smirks. “Okay, so I’ll admit that maybe I’m losing my mind because I have to finish this book and I know that, I do, but I can’t seem to figure out how to end it. It’s like the ending is right there, and I know it’s going to be so beautiful, I just can’t find the right words. ”
I reach out and lightly tug at her biceps until she shuffles forward, wrapping her arms around my waist and dropping her forehead against my chest.
“It’s right there, Lee. ”
I fold her in my arms and bend to kiss the top of her head. “Maybe, darlin’, you can’t find the words because the story isn’t finished. ”
Her head tips up and rests against my chest with her chin. “Meaning?”
“I’m not going to pretend to understand what goes on in your head when you’re writing those brilliant books of yours, but baby, you’ve told me enough about this book that I see all the parallels with our own story. Maybe you can’t find the end because it’s not ready to be written. ”
Her nose crinkles and she bites her lip.
“I love you, darlin’. Take the time you need to work it out. I’ll go pick up Molly from Mom and we’ll go out to lunch. That should give you a few hours to figure out what you need. ”
“Okay, I can do that,” she says, but I can tell she isn’t paying attention. I’ve already lost her to her words.
I love watching her work. I could have a full conversation with her and she wouldn’t hear a word of it because her mind is still playing chess with her characters.
I also wasn’t kidding when I told her why I think she’s held up on ending her newest book. She’s let me read the beginning of The Helping Hand, a book she told me was titled after me. Or better yet, my urging in the beginning of our relationship to take my hand. It wasn’t a shock after hearing that that the book she’s working on might as well be a biography of her life.
Which is exactly why I think she can’t finish it.
Yet.
But that should all change soon.
As long as my lunch date with my favorite five-year-old goes as planned, that is.
“I’ll be home later,” I tell her and kiss her forehead again.
“Buckle up, little lady,” I tell Molly before shutting the door of my truck and turning back to my mom.
“She’s a sweetheart, Liam. ”
“I know, Mom. Best girl in the world,” I tell her, making her smile grow.
“I’m guessing you already know this, if I’m judging your plans today correctly, but you don’t have to worry. That little girl already thinks the world of you. ”
I close my eyes and nod.
“In fact, I think you’ll be happy with what you find out if you just ask her. ”
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“Ask her what, Mom?”
“To be her daddy,” she leans forward and whispers, looking behind me where Molly is singing along to the radio.
“She’s already got a daddy, Mom. I would love to hear those words from her one day, but I don’t want to take her father’s place. I’d gladly share the role, but not take it when it’s already been taken. God, I’m a nervous mess. ”
She reaches forward and pats my cheek, “I know you are. It’s a big step, but one I know you’re ready for. I’ve told you over and over how much of your father I see in you, but watching you fall in love with Megan really brought that home. Don’t second guess yourself, son. I understand what you’re saying about Molly and her daddy, but just because she has a father that she lost, doesn’t mean you would be replacing him by stepping into those shoes. That girl has more love to give then she could ever figure out how to give out. ”
“As far as I’m concerned she’s already my daughter. ”
My mother’s wise eyes look into mine and she smiles, “And as far as your father and I are concerned she’s already our granddaughter, so . . . I suspect it’s up to you to make that official. ”
I laugh, say my goodbye and then hug my mom before jumping into the driver’s seat.
“You and me have a date today,” I tell a smiling Molly.
Her eyes grow huge and she looks over at me like I hold all the secrets in the world. “A date?”
“Yeah. You’re my favorite little girl in the whole entire universe. It’s time for me to show you off. Let everyone know that you’re mine. ”
Her eyes don’t lose their wide wonderment, but she gives me a small grin. “I’m yours?” she questions.
“Forever and ever, stuck with the biggest, stickiest, gooiest piece of bubblegum in the whole world. ”
She laughs, loud, and smiles at me with her crooked smile.
Molly chatters off and on about everything she did at my parent’s house the night before. I don’t hear much, my nerves too busy holding my attention, but I slip in responses here and there, each time her big smile grows a little more.
God, I love that kid.
When we get to the Italian restaurant that she loves so much, I make a big production of walking around to her side of the truck, pulling the back door of the duel cab open, and offering her my arm after helping her climb down. The whole time she just giggles.
Her snickers don’t stop until we’ve placed our order and our drinks are delivered.
“Leelee?”
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“I love you more than the moon,” she says softly with an undertone of unsureness that has me moving from the seat in front of her, to the one next to her.
“Molly, look at me baby,” I demand and wait for her to move her light brown eyes from her water. “You want to know a secret?”
Her small head nods and she continues to study my face.
“I had another reason, other than showing the prettiest five-year-old in the whole universe off, to take you out on a date, just me and you. You see, I have big huge plans that I need to make with you. Plans I need to be kept a super-secret, secret. Can you do that?”
She gives me another nod, a small smile coming over her face, and I can tell she’s losing some of that uncertainty that had come when telling me that she loved me. This little girl, having gone through so much in her little life, who loves bigger than anyone I know, is actually afraid I would turn her love away.
“You need to know, without a single doubt that I love you back, sweetheart. I love you just as much as I love your mommy, and that, Molly, is huge. ”
“How huge?” she whispers.
“All the way to the sun. All the way to the moon. All the way to the farthest star away from us. And then back again. ”
“That’s really, really far away,” she gasps.
“It sure is. I told you. I love you huge, sweetheart. ”
She’s silent for a few seconds and I sit back. When her small hand reaches out and lands on the one I have resting just besides her water glass, I look back up and see questions in her eyes.
“What’s on your mind, Molly?”
“If you love me huge and I love you huge, does that mean that you’ll be my second daddy now?”
And my heart, when I didn’t think it could get any bigger, grows so large my chest burns with it.
“There isn’t anything I would love more, Molly. ”
“Yay,” she says, her tone soft and her eyes bright.
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“Yay,” I answer in my own hushed tone.
“One more thing, baby, and then we can have the best spaghetti in town. Are you ready for that big, huge secret? You can’t tell anyone. ”
Her head bobs, each long blonde ringlet dancing against her skin.
“In a few days, I’m going to take your mommy somewhere, somewhere special to us because the last time we were there she took my hand and nev
er let it go. This time, sweetheart, this time I’m hoping that she takes my hand again. The only difference is, when she takes it this time, it means the three of us become a family. ”
“That sounds fun, Le—Daddy,” she whispers.
And there goes that sharpness in my chest. Again.
“I have to ask you something first though, Molly. Something that’s a huge secret so you can’t tell your mommy, but I have to ask you because in order to have your mommy give me her hand, I want to know you will too. ”
