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Janice: We went to the house to get last-minute things ready. Thought you could use the extra quiet and rest. Head over whenever you’re ready. Love you.
A wave of nausea rolls in my belly. There’s nothing from Chase, though I don’t know why I would expect there to be. It would have been nice to have gotten some form of support from him, though—today of all days. But knowing everyone so easily left without me makes me feel even worse.
Drake has checked in on me a few times, but I haven’t necessarily known how to explain my feelings to him. I don’t want to complain, to tell him how lonely and scared I feel right now, when he just lost what was essentially a sister to him. Janice has been wonderfully sweet and helpful, but understandably, her main focus has been on Willow, and I haven’t wanted to distract from that.
So, I haven’t delved into Chase’s rejection with them. Truthfully, a part of me thought this was only temporary. That he was in shock and needed time, and it wouldn’t be long before he just snapped out of it and apologized for his behavior. But after three days, I’m starting to wonder how much longer we can go on like this.
Three days is nothing when it comes to someone working through their grief, but I’ve felt so alone that it’s pushed me into a confused and fragile state. I’m only human—two humans, in fact, and the two of us have a lot of hormones to contend with.
Still, I had grown to feel comfortable here. For the first time in my entire life, I felt like I belonged. I had a future with the man I love, and I was excited for what it would bring. I couldn’t wait to meet my baby and build a stronger relationship with Chase. But now I’m scared that I don’t belong here anymore, with them.
So where does that leave me?
