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20
She’d fucked it. Well and truly fucked it.
Jen took a breather from making cocktail pouches, pushing against the metal table’s edge and arching her back.
It was her day off but she’d decided to come in and make extra, ready for a busy week ahead. Her cocktail masterclass was this week and the publicity would propel sales, so she needed to be ready.
Plus, it was a distraction from the fact Holly was ignoring her messages.
Taylor’s was also closed today, and Jen wished she knew where Holly lived.As if that’s not stalkery.
She’d been super weird last night, but Jen had convinced herself she was being paranoid. She had cracker drama to sort out. Today, though? Messages left on read. That was undeniable.
Jen picked up the measuring jug with a sigh and decanted it into the pouches.
She hadn’t actually done anything. Yes, the prosecco might have gone to her head and she’d picked a play fight, but where was the harm in that? Friends could do that, right?
But God, why, why,whyyyydid she have to ask about the whole touching thing?
Jen winced, her whole face scrunching in disgust.
What a fucking weirdo.
If Holly hadn’t cottoned onto her massive crush before last night, Jen was scuppered now. She may as well have hired a plane to tow a banner declaring it.
If the shoe was on the other foot, she would be creating distance, too.
Their moment in the car was lodged front and centre in Jen’s mind, a life raft in an otherwise stormy sea. It refused to give it up, clinging on for dear life, looking for clues she could have missed and reading into the minutest details, creating connections. But what if that’s all it was? A figment of her imagination? She’d seen flickers at home, but nothing as intense. She’d been afraid to let it sit and see how it played out, but she’d do anything to go back now. With no phones to interrupt, who knows what would have happened?
Courage was always easy after the fact.
She knew she was in trouble when she almost took Holly’s hand. It had felt like the most natural thing in the world, to reach out, lace their fingers together, and trace Holly’s palm with her thumb. She’d caught herself just in time and it felt like she’d pulled herself back from stepping in front of a speeding car. She was getting careless, and there were no second chances.
Now it felt like her insides were in the wrong place; everything just slightly out of position. To look at, she was normal, but nothing felt right. Something was always just off. Maybe she’d go for a run later, expel some energy.
Jen checked her phone again, just in case she’d missed it vibrating. Nothing.
Maybe it wasn’t working.
That would make sense.
She fired off a message to Chloe, keeping it casual. She didn’t need to know Jen was slowly losing her mind.
She and Alison hadn’t been this complicated, but then they hadn’t agreed to win a competition together or pretend to fake-date. There was no hiding their attraction; no story to weave. Just good old-fashioned physicality. Girl meets girl andboom.
Trust me to go this long being single and then pick the most convoluted and confusing relationship possible.
Her phone vibrated against the metal table, making her jump. Anticipation gripped Jen’s stomach: it had to be Holly.
Her face fell and her shoulders sagged.
Chloe.
You did just text her.
Okay, so Jen’s phone was working. Maybe Holly just didn’t have a good signal. Whatever she was up to, perhaps she had enough bars to read messages, just not enough to reply? Was that a thing? It sounded like it could be a thing.
They had their third date this week. Was it going to be super awkward?It’s been one day.She was getting ahead of herself.
