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You said you loved me.
He couldn’t say the words, and I didn’t fault him. Knowing I had hurt him so badly with my callous attitude and foolish attempt at self-preservation made my palms sweat and my airway constrict.
I slid my legs over the side of the bed and stood, but stopped short of crossing the room to him. He didn’t look like he’d welcome my touch. At least not yet. I still had some groveling to do.
“I was wrong. I was hurt, and I shut down. But of all people, you were the one I should have been open with. I should have known better, but I… in the past few years, I’ve had to shift my entire nature to prepare for this, and part of that was cutting off everything and everyone who wasn’t essential to me. That was my first mistake.” I stepped closer, shaving just a hair off that mile-wide chasm between us. “You are essential to me.”
He dropped his gaze, his jaw tight and working overtime as he clenched it hard enough to crush diamonds between his teeth.
Another step closer.
“I’ve felt like shit these past weeks, struggling with things on my own and trying to figure out the right things to do. And now I just feel so stupid, because I didn’t have to be going through any of it alone; if only I’d been smart enough to wake up and let you in. Beg you to come back to me.”
Another step.
“Red, I can’t do this again.” His voice was gruff, as though it pained him to say the words, but they couldn’t have slashed him nearly as deeply as it sliced me to hear them. “I understand not letting anyone in, because that’s how I lived my entire life. You cutting me out like I meant less than nothing is exactly the kind of shit I wanted to avoid. I’m not gonna survive it if it happens again. So I believe that you feel bad, but I can’t.”
The tears on my cheeks left chilly, wet trails as they dripped off my chin. But I wasn’t done. I wasn’t going to accept this from him. He was going to have to forgive me and get back onboard the Thea and Darrio train.
Choo-choo, sex god.
Giving him space be damned, I crossed the remaining distance between us and gripped his large hands, clenching them tightly.
“I know I hurt you, and I probably don’t have the right to ask for your forgiveness. So I’m not asking. I’m demanding it. I love you, Darrio, and I know you love me, too, no matter what’s happened between us. I’m not perfect, and neither are you, so chances are this won’t be the last time one of us wants to call it quits because we’ve hurt each other. But as long as one of us is strong enough not to walk away, we’ll always make it work. At first, it was you, making sure I was okay and giving me the time I needed. Now, it’s my turn.” I dropped one of his hands and cupped his stubbled cheek, the prickles on my palm a welcome and sorely missed sensation. “I love you, and I’m not going anywhere. If you need time to push me away, take it. But I’ll still be here when you’re done.”
His gaze seared into mine, tearing through me and seeing deeper than anyone should have ever been able to. And I let him. Hell, I pulled the curtain back further and let everything I felt for him pour out of me. My thumb stroked over his cheek as he stared, and I gripped his hand like it was a lifeline, my only tether to that moment, and to him.
“Red.” The single whispered word speared me through the heart more than any long poetic speech ever could have.
“Please—”
His lips swooped down, capturing mine in a kiss that lit up every nerve in my body. My hand on his cheek went to his nape, and the other one joined it, clinging to him as he devoured me. My heart raced as I kissed him back with equal desperation. It was like taking the first breath after being forced underwater for too long.
One second I was clinging to him like some kind of love leech, the next his mouth was ripped away as he scooped me up and tossed me onto his bed. I couldn’t fight the smile or the stupid giggle that came out when I bounced on the mattress.
Darrio, for some reason, didn’t see the humor in the situation.
His customary hoodie and t-shirt underneath were gone in a single movement, baring his exquisitely carved chest and abs. I didn’t get to admire them nearly long enough before he was on his hands and knees, crawling up over me on the bed. When our noses brushed, he dropped one soft, sweet kiss on my lips before pulling back.
“Say it again.”
I didn’t have to ask what. “I love you.”
His growl reverberated up his chest as he dipped his head again, nipping my lower lip.
“More, Red.”
“I love you.” I gasped when he nibbled my jaw and moved down to lave my throat. “I love you, I love you, I—” My litany of love was cut off by my sharp cry of pleasure as he lowered his hips between my thighs and ground his hard cock against my pussy. I knew I’d been turned on, but I hadn’t realized the ache was so intense until I got a little relief.
“I love you, too. Fuck, do I love you.” Another slow grind against my center made me curse whatever progressive idiot had decided pants were a good idea for women. A skirt and he could have already been inside me.
Okay, I took that back. I loved what jeans did for my ass, but still. I loathed all fabrics at the moment.
As much as I wanted to whip off my clothes and order him to do the same, there was a more pressing need that had to be satiated first.
“Look at me.” The raspy words caught his attention, and the fire in his eyes threatened to scorch me hotter than River’s flames ever could. “I’m so, so sorry. I need you to forgive me, not just fuck me. I mean, I definitely need you to fuck me—hard—but not until you forgive me.”
“Dammit, Red, of course I forgive you. How could I not? You’re mine. When you’re perfect and when you make me so mad I could strangle you, you are always, eternally mine.”
