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‘I’ve seen no proof of anything of the kind,’ she said, trying to smile.
‘Probably a good thing.’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’
James sighed and sat in the chair opposite her. ‘That you are sweet. And men like him are not.’
‘People keep saying I am sweet. Why is that? What have I done to suggest that I am?’
‘You...’
‘I am stupid, is what I am. I do not know enough people, I have not been educated broadly on enough topics, I have not done enough.’
‘You are not stupid,’ James said. ‘You are innocent.’
‘Well, I am tired of it.’
‘Do you wish for him to take your innocence?’
She suddenly felt that same warmth she’d felt in the carriage. She was embarrassed, but...but James had told her his secrets. Secrets that could see him jailed. What did she have to fear with her friend? This dear, lovely friend who had put his faith in her in such a real way. ‘I... It would be better if I knew what that meant.’
‘There is nothing to know. Beatrice, I knew what I was, what I wanted, before I knew details or specifics. You do not need to know the full list of things one might do, to know you wish them.’ She still felt confused, but she couldn’t be angry because his smile was so gentle. ‘The question is, do you want to be closer to him?’
‘I...’
‘Do you want to kiss him?’
Her face went hot. ‘I do... I...’
‘Then kiss him, Beatrice.’
‘He said...’
‘That has nothing to do with what he wants.’
Bea’s breathing became short, harsh, and she could feel her heart beating in her temples. ‘James, I cannot...’
‘Whatever he says, Beatrice, you are his wife.’
She let out a long breath. ‘Enough about me. Please. What are you doing?’
‘I came to tell you I’m leaving.’
‘Leaving?’
‘Yes, I...am travelling to Rome with a friend.’ The way he said friend was heavy.
‘Will you stay there?’
‘For a while at least.’ He smiled. ‘I’m happy, Beatrice.’
‘I am very glad for you, I...’
She felt him before she saw him and when she looked up, her husband was in the doorway with all the subtlety of a storm. ‘Your Grace,’ James said, standing quickly. ‘I came to say goodbye to your wife. I’m leaving the country.’
Briggs’s eyes flickered over him. ‘You must be James.’
He did not sound friendly, or impressed.
