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Focusing on the cards, I shuffle the deck, cut three times, then pluck the one from the top. “Well, at least it’s not the Wheel of Fortune,” I say, unsure whether to be relieved or worried. Realizing they’re waiting for the reveal, I wave it before them.

“The Magician.” Hawke nods in approval. “Now look at the card and tell us what you see. Whatever pops into your head.”

This deck is newer, more modern than the deck my dad showed me, and some of the symbols are changed. I’m about to tell them as much, but for some reason those words just won’t come. Though thankfully, other words do.

“He’s Major Arcana. The first card on the journey, right after the Fool, which is numbered zero. He’s highly creative, an inventor…” My voice fades, my belly’s gone queasy, and for some unknown reason, I’m starting to sweat.

“And…” Hawke prompts.

“And, uh…” My hand is shaking, so I take a steadying breath and start again. “There’s an infinity symbol over his head, and, well, you know what that means. Also, his right hand points skyward. Oh, and it holds a wand. The left hand points toward the ground. The pose is meant as anas above so belowsort of thing. He’s got all his tools assembled and he’s ready to combine spirit and matter and…and transcend this known realm.” A lump builds in my throat and I force the words past. “Also, he’s ruled by Mercury, which is also an alchemical symbol.”

“Anything else?”

I rub my lips together and stare at the card so hard, my vision actually blurs. As a one card, the Magician is related to the Wheel of Fortune card, which is a ten, and since the cards are connected to numerology, in which 1 + 0 reverts to 1, they’re connected.

Although I choose not to share any of that.

“Natasha—is that all?” Arthur barks, pulling me away from my thoughts.

I lift my gaze to his, suck in a quick breath, and say, “The card is you.”

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