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CHAPTER1
tori
Iset the vase of flowers onto the table then turn to put my purse and keys away. I don’t know why I still bother to buy them because nothing about them brings comfort. But I do. And regardless of how painful it still is, I probably always will.
The day is one I’ll never forget—June 12th.
When Kyle left for work that morning, I never would’ve guessed it’d be the last time I’d ever see him again. Alive, this is.
One week shy of our five-year wedding anniversary. One week before our getaway to his parents’ cottage in Sechelt. Not only was it the most ideal time to visit, but it was the perfect time for us to work on making a baby.
Tears fill my eyes just thinking about it.
Kyle had wanted to wait until he was done training with the Fire Academy before trying, and while I was okay with that, I also knew that my biological clock was ticking.
I wanted to become a mother so badly. Unlike my own mother who’d waited until she was almost forty to have me. She and my father had divorced not long after her pregnancy announcement and it was a huge struggle for her to raise me singlehandedly. I can’t say I totally blame my father for wanting out of the marriage—I mean, who wants to take care of a kid when they’re in their fifties—but he should’ve considered the consequences when he married someone thirteen years younger than him.
Kyle knew I was putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself about having a baby. And it didn’t help that he worked in shifts. It was Kyle’s dream to become a firefighter and I supported him every step of the way, even if it meant going days and sometimes weeks before we were able to have sex.
This getaway couldn’t have come at a better time, and I’d even gone so far as to order a sexy little negligée, despite how modest I felt about my body. Kyle never failed to remind me how sexy he found me to be, but I could never accept that my stick-thin figure and barely-there chest was the slightest bit attractive. His kindness was only one of the reasons why I loved my husband so much.
With the school term ending the following week, I was almost as excited as my first-graders. Except they were looking forward to summer break while I was anxious for this alone time with Kyle.
My phone rang just shy of eight o’clock that night and I quickly picked it up when I saw my best friend and co-worker’s name on the screen.
“Hey, Rena, what’s up?” Rena’s always called late at night so seeing her number doesn’t cause any reason for concern.
“Oh, my God, Tori. Did you see the news? Two of our students perished in a fire earlier this evening. I am so heartbroken.” She says this all in one breath.
“No!” I shout into the phone. Of all things, this is the worst possible news she could’ve shared. “Not two of our babies.”
“I’m afraid so. I don’t know any details, but I’ll let you know if I find out anything more.”
“Please do. Kyle usually lets me know when something tragic happens, but I haven’t heard from him since before noon. I was out picking up a few things for our trip next weekend, so I wasn’t even aware there’d been a fire.”
There’s so much sadness in Rena’s tone it’s almost hard to make out what she’s saying. “I can’t imagine what the family must be going through.”
Knock, knock, knock.
“Hold on, Rena. Let me call you back. Someone is knocking at the front door.”
I put down the phone then pad over to the door. We never had a peephole on our door while growing up, and I still can’t get used to using one now. Although I seriously doubt that seeing Kyle’s Chief and the County Coroner standing on the other side of our door would’ve lessoned the blow of their news either.
I knew from the looks on both their faces something was wrong. That something tragic had happened to Kyle.
Chief Clifton Morris removed his hat and pressed it against his abdomen. “Tori.”
My bottom lip began to quiver making it difficult to speak. “Cliff? What’s going on?”
“Do you mind if we come inside?”
Covering my mouth with my hands, I immediately began to shake my head no. “I…I don’t think so.”
“Tori,” he began again.
Sadly, the news was still going to be the same whether I let him inside or not.
“Did something happen to Kyle? Is he okay?”
“Tori, please. Can we come inside?”
