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‘I think you should stay here because you want to and because it’s best for everyone.’
‘Not for me. I won’t stay and be an instrument of your self-flagellation, another weapon for your sadism. You punished yourself every year by going to Chrysá Vráchia, and now you plan to punish yourself by having a wife you desire but won’t ever love, because it would betray Amy. No, thanks. That’s not for me.’
He let out a curse and crossed the room, but Hannah was done. She lifted a hand, stalling him.
‘I’m sorry I couldn’t disconnect my feelings as well as you did yours. I’m sorry I agreed to this only to change my mind, but I didn’t have all the facts.’ She reached for the enormous diamond engagement ring that had never really suited her anyway and dislodged it, sliding it over her knuckle and off her hand.
‘I’ll go back to London,’ she said, thinking quickly. ‘That makes sense for now. It’s close enough that you can see her often.’
He made a noise of frustration. ‘I don’t want you to go.’
‘I know that,’ she whispered. ‘But can you give me any reason that’s good enough to stay?’
He didn’t say anything, his eyes running over her face as if he could see inside her soul and find some way to induce her to remain. But there was none—not that he could give her.
‘I have a house in London,’ he said, his eyes dropping to her lips before he tore them away, looking over her shoulder. ‘You should take it.’
‘No, thanks.’
‘Hannah,’ he groaned. ‘You’re the mother of our child. I need you to be somewhere safe. Somewhere decent. Just...take the damned house for now. We’ll sort out the paperwork later.’
‘Once she’s born,’ Hannah compromised quietly. ‘But my room is still available. All my stuff is still in it, in fact. I can go back and it’ll be like nothing ever happened.’ Her smile hurt, stretching across her face, filling her with grief.
‘And what of your safety? Do you no longer care for that?’
She felt her stomach twist because he was doing everything he could to get her to stay—but for all the wrong reasons. ‘I presume you fully intend to send guards to watch over me?’
He dipped his head in silent concession.
‘I will cooperate with you on security, Leonidas.’ Her eyes scanned his face. ‘I’m not an idiot. If there’s even a chance anything will happen to her because of who you are then I want all the help in the world to keep her safe. But that doesn’t require marriage. It do
esn’t mean I have to stay here—with you.’ She swallowed, a surreal sense of disbelief that this was happening taking over her.
He swore in Greek, bringing his body to hers, pressing their foreheads together, his eyes shut. ‘We can make this work.’
But Hannah knew it was a lie. Not an intentional deceit, so much as a desire to give her what she needed without losing any part of himself. He didn’t want to hurt her. He was a good person, and this hadn’t been in his plan.
She swallowed past the lump in her throat, a throat that was raw and stinging. ‘No, we can’t.’ She lifted up on her tiptoes then, because she couldn’t resist, and pressed a kiss to his cheek. ‘But at least we can say we tried.’
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
THERE WERE NO photos of Amy and Brax in any of his homes for one very simple reason. Leonidas needed no photo in order to see them. They were burned into his retinas, his brain, his heart and soul. He saw them readily, and without any effort.
And now, Hannah was there too, and she was imprinted in a way that was impossible to scrub. He fell asleep with her smiling behind his eyelids and woke up with a start, seeing her visceral, deep pain on that last morning.
Her words were a whisper in his ears all day long. ‘I’m here, and I love you.’
Leonidas had become used to the torment of this—and it was a different torment, because, unlike Amy and Brax, Hannah was out there, within reach, a living, breathing person who loved him.
And he wanted her.
He needed her.
But he wasn’t messed up enough to know he didn’t deserve her. That he couldn’t do that to her. Not when she’d fallen in love with him.
She deserved love. Hadn’t he known that all along? Hadn’t he wished she hadn’t fallen pregnant to him purely because he knew she deserved to meet someone who would dedicate their life to loving her? Completely, unreservedly, in every way? She’d find that person, he was sure of it.
And what would happen then? Leonidas wondered. In fact, in the month since Hannah had left the island, Leonidas had thought about that a lot. When he wasn’t drinking Scotch and glowering at the ocean, or snapping at the domestic staff and firing off ill-thought-out emails, he was imagining what Hannah’s life post-Leonidas might look like.
