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“But it’s never going to stop, Iz,” he says through strangled tears. “Even now, I feel them. In my head, in the shadows. God, they’re in my fucking pores! Everywhere and nowhere and I’m just… so tired. What if they never go away? What if they’re part of me now?”

I choke on a sob as I cling to his arm but it’s not enough. How could it be? What could possibly be enough? I’m useless. He’s right. Words donothing.

“Tristan…” I can barely get his name out.

You’re going to be okay.

You’re safe now.

You’re—

“The answer is six.”

No!

“You wanted to know how many times before it stopped counting? Just six.”

My heart splinters. The jagged shards slice into me as I suck in toxic air.

No. No, no, no!!

Tears sear down my cheeks. I want to scream but I can’t. I want to fight but I don’t even know the enemy. I want to love his beautiful, fractured soul back together but how the fuck am I supposed to do that when it was violated in a defective world that shouldn’t even exist?!

“It should have been more, right?” he chokes out. “I’m so sorry, Iz. It should have been...”

“Tristan, no.”

He breaks down, and I break apart.

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