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My heart clenched, wishing that was true. I used my mouth to stroke his dick, up and down, taking him as deep as I could without gagging. When I needed a break, I used my hand to stroke him and focused my mouth on the tip. I ran my tongue around the rim, loving how his hips bucked and he groaned when I did. I worked him, feeling his dick grow thicker and longer as I did.
“Beth,” his breath was hoarse as he reached for me. He handed me the condom. “Ride me, baby.”
If that’s what he wanted, then that was what I’d give him. I unwrapped the condom and rolled it on. Then I moved over him.
“Are you wet or do you need me to get you there?” he said stroking his fingers through my pussy. He smiled. “You’re wet.”
I nodded as took his dick and put it at my entrance.
“Take it, baby. Take all of him.”
My gaze held his as I lowered down over him until I couldn’t go any further. I stayed there, wanting to savor the feel of him inside me. He levered up, running his hands up my back and pulling me to him in a scorching kiss that made my pussy clench. I rocked my hips as he kissed me hard.
Finally, when I thought I might run out of breath, he broke away. His gaze returned to mine as I rocked over him.
“You’re so beautiful.” His words and his gaze held such reverence for me, that guilt lanced my soul. Not just at my deception, but at knowing this would be our last time together. I felt certain he wanted more. Expected more. He was doing all he could to ensure there would be more. But this would be it.
I gripped his shoulders, wishing I could tell him what was going on in my heart, but instead, I use my body. I switched from rocking to riding, sliding up and down.
“Fuck, yes,” he said as his eyes closed and his head dropped back. I gave myself over to the sensations then too. Closing my eyes and focusing on the feel of him, pulsing and sliding inside me. The way his hands gripped my hips.
He lay back, his hips rising to meet mine as I rode him. His fingers pinched my nipples, ratcheting up my need so that I started to ride him faster. Each time, the urgency built until I was gasping for breath as I sped to my release.
“Fuck I’m gonna come Beth… there, there, there….” His thumb brushed over my clit.
“I’m coming,” I cried out as my orgasm slammed into me, hard and fast, and then radiated out in titanic waves.
He let out a loud, feral growl, and then bucked up, as his own release overtook him. I was still riding my own high, but I fought to watch him as the torturous expression morphed into ultimate pleasure on his face. My heart cried out, wanting this man so badly. Wanting him and our daughter and the happily ever after we planned six summers ago. I cursed our fathers for taking that from us. And for the circumstance I was in now that made me too afraid to tell the truth. For as much as I wanted him, I had to protect Hannah more. I’d sacrifice anything for her, including my chance at a life with Ash.
We lay quietly for a time, but finally, putting off leaving became torture. It was time for me to go. He tried again to make me stay but didn’t stop me as I rose and got dressed.
He escorted me down to the ground floor. “We never finished dinner. You sure you don’t want to eat?”
I shook my head. “No thank you. It was a nice evening.”
He laughed. “That’s an understatement.” He cocked his head to the side and pushed my hair back behind my ear. “Are you okay, Beth?”
“Yes. Just tired… and sated,” I added so he’d think I was in the midst of a sexual hangover.
“Me too.” He leaned forward, giving me another one of those sweet kisses. “When can I see you again?”
I shrugged. I couldn’t tell him never. But I couldn’t lie either. Or… I couldn’t lie more than I already was.
He helped me into the car he ordered for me. He wanted to take me home, but I couldn’t bear to see him and not have him any longer. Thankfully he respected my wishes.
As the car wove through the streets of New York, I wept. I’d get it all out now, because when I got home, it would be time to finish dealing with our finances, put the townhome up for sale, and arrange for Hannah and me to start a new life.
13
Ash – Tuesday
Get your head in the game, Ash. I shook my head of the latest thoughts about Beth and tried to focus on my work. Every time I was with Beth, there were moments of perfection, and I didn’t just mean the sex, although that was spectacular. But beyond the sex, there were times when we clicked, and it felt like how it had been between us six years ago. And then, something would change, and she’d bolt. I was pretty sure she had no intention of seeing me again, and it fucking made me crazy. Why was she so resistant to me? I explained what happened when I left, and I felt like she believed me. Did it have to do with whatever was going on with Ben, who never did respond to my message, but had clearly signed over authority to deal with the club to Beth?
