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Though, to be honest, that wasn’t much like Marsie, either. He wasn’t sure she wouldn’t have been happier if she’d followed some path other than the one her parents set out for her, but he had never once heard her wish she had done something different. She hadn’t done something different, and so she was living the life that she’d made for herself and doing it the best way possible.
No looking back and no regret.
Was that kind of acceptance enough for him? It seemed the very opposite of spark.
But it also seemed the very definition of loyalty and devotion. Maybe it wasn’t the romance of flowers and poetry, but it was the romance that led to being seventy-five and holding hands while walking through the park.
That was what his parents had. It was what he’d always wanted.
I could have that with Marsie. His heart was heavy as he lifted his lunch to the edge of his desk.
Was he being a fool?
Not sure what else to do, he thought about texting Allison for advice. They were on their way to becoming friends, and she’d had good dating advice before, as she’d realized that she shouldn’t be dating anymore. Jill would probably answer his call, too, and she had met Marsie, so she might have even better advice.
Instead, he reached for his phone and called his mom. While the phone rang, he took a drink from his cold coffee. It didn’t matter that it was cold; coffee was always better when Marsie was a part of it.
“Hello, dear,” his mom said by way of greeting. “You don’t usually call on weekdays. What’s wrong?”
“I’m just working through some things in my head that you might be able to help me with.”
“Oh, I love it when you call for advice. I always learn so much about what’s going on with you when you’re screwing up.”
“Hey,” he said, insulted. “What makes you think I’m screwing up?”
“That’s the only reason you ever ask for advice. When your life is going along swimmingly and you’re getting everything you want, you call to check in on how I’m doing, and I have to pry to figure out how you’re doing.”
“Well, how are you doing?” He sat back in his office chair and put his feet up on his desk. This was going to be a long conversation.
“Better now that you called. I’m guessing that you want relationship advice.”
“Mom, you’ve been married to Dad forever. Why would I ask you for relationship advice?”
“Because I’ve been married to your dad forever. And because you asked him about how we decided to get married. Do you think we don’t talk?”
No, but sometimes he wished they didn’t.
“Your dad said you were waiting for love at first sight. Because you thought we were love at first sight.”
“Well, that’s how you always explained it to me.” Seriously, his parents were great, but they both acted like he was in the wrong for believing their stories of deciding to get married.
“I knew I could love your dad without trying to fix him. My mom used to follow my dad around the house, giving him little hints about making his life better. I think he ignored her, but it always drove me crazy and I swore I wouldn’t do that to my own husband. Your dad was the first person I met who I didn’t feel needed fixing.”
If he closed his eyes, he could imagine his grandmother following his grandfather around the house telling him things like, “If you put your cream in your cup before you put in your coffee, you wouldn’t need to stir it.” Even as a kid, that had annoyed him. He couldn’t imagine living with it himself. And he’d never once seen his grandfather put cream in his cup first.
“That’s what Dad meant when he said he was better than all the other bozos you’d dated.”
His mom sighed. “They weren’t bozos. They just weren’t for me. And I probably wasn’t for them, either.”
“So it wasn’t love at first sight. Like Dad said, you wanted out of the house and he was the best available option.” He reached out for his coffee cup again, then remembered it was cold and sat back in his chair. He should have called his mom after getting a fresh cup of coffee.
She laughed. His mom actually laughed. “That doesn’t make it sound very romantic, does it?”
