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I used to think in black and white. Pure good, pure bad. But I’m starting to suspect something dark lies behind the blinding color of white. Something dark just might lie behind everything I thought was so pure.
* * * *
The Sunday before my second week at Southeast brought a fresh fall of snow and a surprise visitor.
Mom’s work called her in again. From listening in on one of her conversations with Barry, I learned a co-worker of hers had been fired, so she would probably be working a lot of overtime and strange hours until a replacement was hired.
Half of me was happy; I wouldn’t have to ache inside, missing the woman she used to be whenever I saw her. The other half wanted to cling to her leg and beg her not to leave me alone in this huge lonely house with a grown man I didn’t know and wasn’t entirely convinced I could trust.
Thinking it best to keep a low profile, I camped out in my room, cruising the internet in an attempt to see what my crew from Hillsburg was up to. But none of them were online. I wanted to call, but things had been so strained the last time we spoke, I didn’t know if I should bother them. If they were through with me, I should have the dignity to bow out of their lives gracefully, right?
Oh, who was I kidding? I freaking missed my friends. I missed my mom. I missed my cramped bedroom and small bed.
I wanted to go home.
Glancing around the room, I realized why I’d yet to completely unpack, why I hadn’t decorated with my personal tastes. My stay here felt temporary, like I was on vacation.
But this was permanent. This was home.
I shivered and rubbed at my prickling arms. Adjusting to my new life was not going as smoothly as I’d hoped.
When the doorbell rang, I didn’t even twitch with the need to find out who was calling. Wasn’t my house, wouldn’t be for me, right?
But, “Grace,” Barry’s voice called seconds later, “you have a visitor.”
I gasped and bolted to my feet. Immediately, Ryder’s face popped into my mind. Then I snorted and rolled my eyes. Why in the world would Ryder, of all people, visit me?
Maybe he’d come to collect the five bucks I owed him, because I definitely owed him. Todd had done exactly as Ryder had predicted, which irritated and scared me, giving me that whole rabbit-trapped-in-Todd’s-gloating-clutches sensation again.
But no. Ryder had a girlfriend. Ryder would not visit.
Geesh, what was wrong with me, wanting a boy I should in no way, shape, or form even like?
I hurried through the house, that little wishful part of me still hoping to see him. When I reached the entrance, I skidded to a jarring halt, utterly shocked at who had come. After a couple of blinks, I dropped my jaw.
“Adam?” I had to whisper his name because I still couldn’t believe my eyes.
But there he stood, the only boy from the nerd herd, as tall and lanky as ever, his dark hair growing down over his ears because he hated his ears, and a guitar strapped over his shoulder.
It felt so good to see someone from home, I didn’t even question why he was alone, or ask where Schy and Bridget were. I simply opened my arms and charged forward.
“Wow. Oh, wow. What are you doing here?”
Plowing into him with a huge hug, I embraced Adam for the first time ever.
Must’ve shocked him. He jerked in my arms before awkwardly lifting a hand to give me a brief one-armed hug back, then patted my back before letting go and stepping away to make space between us.
I let him go, still smiling like a lunatic as I repeated, “What’re you doing here?”
“I…” He opened his mouth, but stopped short when he glanced behind me.
I turned to find Barry still hanging around, watching us.
Eww. Creepy.
Clearing my throat, I sent my stepdad a forced smile. Then grasped Adam’s elbow tight as I said, “We’ll talk on the porch.”
Adam stumbled along behind me. “But it’s freez—well, okay.”
