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As I watch Katy play with complete free abandon, I know that it’s her who’s made me have this revelation. Without her, I never would have seen my mistakes when it comes to Liam. She’s made me realize that I’m a workaholic and that I can’t always be that way. Once the business restructure has been set into place, I’m going to take a bit of a step back. Yes, I still want to make a success of the company for my father’s sake… but actually I think he would be proud of me if I could be there for Liam more. That’s where my focus should be.
“Daddy, is Katy staying for dinner?” Liam calls out. “She’s fun. I want her to play with me more. I want her to read me a bed time story as well.”
“Erm…” That might be a bit too much for Katy, I don’t want to push her too far. This is all a bit much for me so I know it must be crazy. She only found out that I’m a father recently, and we’ve only just started hooking up. Reading a bed time story and eating with us might be a little bit too close to happy families. “I don’t know, Katy might have dinner plans…”
“You bet I’m staying!” she exclaims gleefully, actually looking like she might be happy to do what Liam asks of her. “Are you crazy, we’ve still got so much more playing to do.”
“Do you want to come to my bedroom and see my toys?”
I glance at my watch while they discuss superheroes that I haven’t even heard of before. “You know what, you guys go and do that and I’ll get dinner started. Does that sound like a good plan?” I feel weird about it, all nervous, but at the same time I’m quite comfortable in the knowledge that Liam likes Katy even more than the women I leave him with on a daily basis. “Anything you want?”
“Sausages!” Liam screams, filling me with relief. Sausages I can do, that isn’t too hard. “Beans too. And chips. That’s my favorite. With ketchup. Don’t forget the ketchup!”
“Ooh mine too,” Katy agrees with a grin. “That sounds perfect.”
As Katy and Liam move towards the stairs I smile and shake my head in utter delight. Today has been such a surprise. When Liam first got brought to my office I was shocked, I freaked out and thought that I wasn’t going to be able to get anything done. Now, I’ve done a whole day’s work, I’ve had a life revelation, and I’ve also seen how great Katy and Liam get on. I feel like the foundation that my world has been built upon has ripped away, but what’s been left in place is something even better. I knew what I felt for Katy was strong, I knew that it was different, but now I genuinely think that she might be the real deal. She might be the one.
I don’t know if I’ve ever believed in fate before, if I’ve ever thought about the one, but with Katy it’s easy to slip into that mindset. She’s pretty much perfect for me. She’s everything that I didn’t even know I needed. She’s everything I want and so much more.
I shove the food into the oven and stand by it while I think. When I first got that phone call from Barry, my accountant, I thought that the world had ended, I thought that I was facing the worst crisis I’d ever seen… but now I can see it more as an opportunity to do things better. I can make the company smaller and better, I can delegate more, I can give myself more time with my son, and I can actually open myself up to love in a way that I haven’t before.
I feel bad that some of my staff might lose their jobs, despite my promise that they wouldn’t, but what I’ll do if that happens in the restructure is help them get new positions. And I don’t just mean writing them a kick ass reference, that’ll just be a part of it. No, I’ll use all my contacts in the industry to get them great jobs with equal or more pay. I’ll do what I can for everyone. It might not be the best I can do, but at least I’ll give it my all. At least I’ll be doing this as a nice person. As nice as I can be. I don’t want everyone to leave thinking of me as an asshole who just tried to save his own skin, this isn’t that at all. This is me just trying…
Finally, I fall from my thoughts as I hear a thundering down the stairs which means Liam and probably Katy are back. I turn to see them both with superhero dolls in their hands, flying them through the air and screaming and yelling as they play. It’s a sight that’s so wonderful it warms up my heart. It makes me wish that Katy could actually be here, and she could stay here forever. She fits in these four walls, she brightens the whole place up, she makes it look amazing.
I could quite happily fall in love with this woman, I think to myself happily. And I think Liam could too… I just hope I get the chance to find out what this could really be.
Chapter Eighteen – Katy
A weariness overcomes me as I say my goodnights to Liam. I certainly didn’t expect my day to take this turn, but it’s been pretty awesome. I haven’t ever spent a lot of time around kids, but hanging out with Liam was awesome. I get on with him better than I ever could have hoped. Maybe meeting him randomly like that was the best thing that could have happened. It made sure there wasn’t any pressure on either of us. We could just have fun.
Now if things do progress with me and Evan, me and Liam have a great bond to begin with.
“Well, that’s him off to sleep,” I say with a smile to Evan. “What a fun day. I don’t know if we got enough work done but we had a good time.”
“I got some done,” Evan tells me with a grin. “But to be honest I had such a good day with Liam, I don’t even care.” He looks longingly towards the bedroom. “It makes me realize that I don’t spend enough time with him, you know? I want to do that more. I suppose this downsize has come at a good time for me, personally.”
Wow. For a closed off mind he’s really opening up to me and it feels great. It also resonates quite well with my situation which stings at my heart. I’ve been trying my hardest not to think about it all day long, especially not after speaking to Grant and Robyn. But now, it’s filling my brain. It’s consumed me completely. I can hardly think of anything else.
“Yeah, I get it,” I tell Evan while taking a seat opposite. I probably should go now, but I don’t want to. He seems quite keen to have me here anyway, so I’m not gonna fight that. “You want to work out a way to have a life outside of work. It’s a bit like the dilemma I’m having. Different, I know because you have a son, but yeah…” I shrug in a way that I hope comes off a bit blasé. I don’t if I want Evan to know how hard I’m hurting over this. “I want a life too.”
“Is that why you’re still struggling?” he asks me in a caring tone of voice. “I take you haven’t made a decision when it comes to being a partner yet or not.”
“No I haven’t made any decisions, I’m still agonizing over it.” I laugh awkwardly. “Some people keep telling me I should do one thing, others tell me to do the other, I guess I just haven’t worked out what I want yet.”
Evan nods slowly and reaches under the counter. When he pulls out a tumbler of some amber looking liquid my heart leaps up into my throat. If we’re about to start drinking alcohol now that increases my chances of staying here the night. I mean, I could get a cab back, but I don’t think that will happen. I think this is a hint that Evan wants me to stay, and damn it I want to stay too.
“I think we should have a celebratory drink, don’t you?” he says with a wink. “I think we’ve earned it after all the hard work and playing that we’ve done today.”
I gulp noisily and give him one sharp nod. I know I should probably say something, but I can’t seem to find the words. The only thing my brain is certain of is the fact that I don’t want to be anywhere but here, with him. Drinking whatever the hell he’s giving to me. Evan slides me the glass and I take it from him, then I take a massive swig from the glass before screwing up my face and almost spitting it out again. It’s disgusting, so burning hot and bitter, but I have to swallow it down. I need to. If I don’t want to ruin the potential mood that’s going on here then I really can’t spit.
“Wow, that was…” I gasp desperately. “That was something.”
“Oh yeah, it’s quite strong.” Evan gives me a playful, teasing smirk. “Sorry about that, it isn’t for anyone who isn’t a hardened drinker.”
“Oh, so you’re a hardened drinker are you?” He shakes his head. “Just with this stuff, I take it?”
To be honest, by the time I get to the second swig anyway, and I take a much more conservative sip, it isn’t too bad. It’s still strong and bitter, but my throat is already on fire so I don’t have to suffer the burning sensations.
