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She eventually forgave him, knowing that it was her own desire to still have him alive and with her. She eventually accepted her fate as well as the idea of spending eternity alone. Just as she accepted never feeling that deep, sexual attraction toward a man, she met Evan and Colton and received those unbelievable vibes, double-time. Now, if she could only let go of her need to control life and allow life to play out its part, then maybe she could learn to accept love again.
* * * *
Colton and Evan made a point of stopping by to spend time with Ava the next few days. Today, they sat on the back porch on the swing bench and talked about the things they wanted in life.
Ava stared out across the grass and inhaled the scents of flowers and summertime. “It’s so nice out here. I feel at peace and I like having both of you with me.” Ava closed her eyes and leaned back against the wood.
“We like being here with you. Maybe tomorrow, you can come over to our place and we could have lunch and relax on the couch and watch a movie or something?” Evan asked.
“That sounds like fun. I’ll let you know.”
She felt Evan’s hand on her knee and then the palm of his hand moved higher, under her skirt. He leaned over and kissed her neck.
“Your skin feels soft and you smell so good.”
She grabbed his hand to stop him from moving any farther.
“Evan, I need time.”
He held her gaze and smiled.
“Sorry, I just can’t seem to resist touching you,” he admitted as he gave her thigh a squeeze. He didn’t remove it from her upper thigh and he didn’t go any farther. She supposed she could let him remain like that. After all, she wanted to be with them and explore their bodies as much as she wanted them to explore hers, but now she had the bruising and the bandage. In another day, she would get the stitches removed and things might be better.
“You got awfully quiet, Ava. You know we want you and that we’re willing to wait until you’re ready to make love,” Colton whispered as he caressed her hair from her shoulder. She looked at him and nibbled her bottom lip. He gently used his thumb to press her lip from her teeth.
“Why are you so worried about being intimate?”
“Does it have something to do with Jonathan?”
Oh God, he was such a good man. She had spoken to Evan and Colton about Jonathan, and of course the baby, a couple times in the past few days. She’d told them that he had been wonderful and caring about her emotions. But Jonathan had nothing to do with her reservations.
She shook her head.
“It’s not that. He was my one and only. I haven’t had sex with anyone else.”
“No one, in so many years?” Evan asked and she shook her head.
“Well, that will make it even more special for the three of us, when the time comes. We’re older, have more experience in that category, but we’re also old enough to know what we want in a relationship,” Colton said.
“I want you both, too, it’s just that, now my body is different. I feel different, and then there’s the scar. It’s not so pretty over here anymore.” She gently rubbed her thumb over her breast then shivered.
Colton placed his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close.
“None of that matters to us. Our feelings for you go beyond the physical. We realize that,” Evan told her as Colton gently squeezed her shoulders.
“How? How do you know? How can you say that this isn’t more than physical between us?”
“You’ve shared a lot about your life with us, Ava, but I failed to share with you the second-worst time of my life. I thought that I knew what I wanted,” Evan began to say, then looked out toward the fields as if trying to gain the confidence he needed to continue. Her heart began to race. She wondered what other tragedy or pain he had encountered in life.
“I met a pretty, young, and energetic woman who drooled all over me and made me feel like a god. We were together for a couple of months when I needed to head back into the service. I had another tour of duty, but planned on maybe making things legit with Chelsea when I returned. Anyway, she told me she was pregnant with my child.”
“Oh God. What happened?”
“Colton didn’t want me to marry Chelsea. He said she wasn’t right for me and that I needed to really look at the type of woman she was. Anyway, a few days before I left, I went to her place to surprise visit her and she wasn’t alone. I found out that the baby wasn’t mine and that she had been cheating on me all along. Despite all that, I offered to care for the baby because she said that the guy I had seen at her place wanted nothing to do with the baby. Turns out she lied about that, too.”
“How did you find out?”
“They were together when they had a car accident. They had been drinking and were completely intoxicated. They all died
