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“And you should hurry up,” I tell him, swallowing back tears, “to get well so you can teach me some more things, okay?”
“For Fred?”
I shake my head, my heart slamming against my ribs. “No more Fred. I’m done with him. For you. Just you.”
How was I so blind before?
“Not good for you,” he whispers. His throat works. “I’m an ex-con connected to drugs.”
“I don’t care. I don’t believe you did any of that.” I run my thumb over his cheekbone. “In fact, I think I love you, Seth Tucker.”
He stares at me, those dark eyes open wide. He reaches up, puts his bigger hand over mine. “You’re joking. This is a dream.”
“No, it’s not, Seth. You’re the one I want.”
His smile comes back full force. “That’s good,” he whispers, his eyes closing. “Because I’ve loved you from the start.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Seth
The journey to the ER takes place in a kind of weird haze. My head feels a size too big for my neck, and even the pain doesn’t seem to clear it. Plus, every movement, every bump in the road jostles my shoulder, and my jaw’s clenched so hard it creaks.
But Manon is there, beside me, her hand on top of mine, and nothing else matters. Even if I have no place to go, if Zane and Rafe want me far from Damage Control, if I don’t have a penny to my name.
“I think I love you.”
Did she mean it? Could she change her mind? Will she stay?
She said it’s not a dream, but what if it is? What if I wake up, curled up in that alley, alone? What if I dreamed her up?
I dreamed a lot wrapped up in my quilt—of Manon walking away, of Shane’s anger, of my mom’s betrayal. Nightmare after nightmare, sinking claws into my mind, tearing my thoughts apart.
And now I’m back at the hospital. Joy. I let the guys manhandle me into a wheelchair, roll me inside. Let the doctors poke me and prod me, ask me questions.
Zane, Rafe and Shane stay outside the examination room. Shane won’t look me in the eye. He feels guilty for punching me, dislocating my shoulder. I’ll need to talk to him later. Tell him I understand. That he was right: I’m the one who got him in this mess in the first place. I deserved that punch, and his anger.
Need to talk to Zane and Rafe, too. Ask them to take Shane back in. Explain he was collateral damage. Nothing that happened three years ago was his fault – and he needs a family, much more than I ever have.
Hell. I press my fist to my aching chest as the doctor says something about broken ligaments and possible surgery. The pressure is back.
“Depending on what?” I ask.
“The x-rays. The fever is sometimes a side effect of a broken bone. Let’s wait and see the results. Come with me, Mr. Tucker.”
I look over my shoulder at Manon, fully expecting her to leave, or simply go up in smoke and vanish.
She doesn’t. She smiles at me, and comes to stand by the bed.
“I’m not going anywhere,” she says, as if reading my mind.
Makes me wonder about the expression on my face. Makes me wonder about lots of things, but as we walk out of the room together, I don’t fucking care. I’ll hold on to this dream for as long as it lasts.
***
Clavicle fracture. Broken ligaments. Dislocation.
The good news is that I won’t need surgery. I may need one in the future if this happens again, but if I’m careful, I may avoid it. Antibiotics, painkillers and a shoulder immobilizer, that’s what I’ll need for now.
