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“Okay, what if…?” Megan leans forward, eyes bright. “What if we talked to Dakota? What if he has said anything in his sleep to help us figure this out? Some name, some detail he doesn’t remember when he’s awake.”
I open my mouth to tell her this won’t work, then close it again.
What does it hurt to try? God knows I’ve wanted to see Dakota again. Haven’t seen her since Sunday, and I’ve been meaning to call her. Didn’t want to disturb her with everything she has going on, but I also want her to know she can lean on us.
“I’m going to call her,” I say, pulling out my phone.
Dakota made Zane happy. She brought him back from the dead with her love, gave him a family. If he’s to make it back to us again whole, we need her help.
Any help we can get.
***
“You guys doing okay? The kids?” Dakota’s smile is tired as she breastfeeds her baby. “Erin, where’s Jax?”
“His dad took him. The guys are having a meeting. Ash has Scott.” My hand is hovering protectively over my belly, and I snatch it away when I notice. For some reason, I don’t feel like sharing the news with my frien
ds just yet. “They’re planning.”
“How is Zane?” Erin asks quietly, reaching over to caress baby Lee’s almost bald head.
“The same.” Dakota’s lower lip quivers and she bites into it. “I mean… He still has these godawful nightmares… sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to throw up. It breaks my heart.” She shakes her head. “He’s taken to sleeping on the sofa, not to wake us up. As if I could sleep through one of his nightmares.”
My chest squeezes so tightly I can barely breathe. I put a hand on her shoulder. “Hang in there, girl.”
“He’d been doing so well for so long, you know? And I can’t do so much because I’m so tired, and Lee,” she nods at the baby in her arms, “he doesn’t sleep much either, and I…” Her voice cracks, and I want so much to hug her.
I squeeze her shoulder instead, not to jostle the baby. “So nothing new?”
“He doesn’t… doesn’t look as defeated as he did last week,” she whispers, looking down at her son. “I think talking to the guys helped.”
My chest expands a little. “We’ll all do everything we can to help. In every way. You know that, right? That we’re here for you.”
She looks up, shoots me a grateful smile that lights up her big blue eyes. “Thanks, Audrey. I had my mom and my aunts over a few times to help out, but since Zane’s nightmares got worse, I stopped asking them.”
Crap, yeah, I can understand that.
What a mess.
“What about Zane’s brother-in-law. Matt, was it? Does he know this is happening?”
“Matt… is in a bad place right now,” Dakota says quietly. “Has been since Emma died. I tried but can’t reach him.”
Crap.
“The guys are taking Zane to Children and Family Services tomorrow to see how to get the info about his past,” Dakota says, then her voice drops and her smile fades. “He’d never wanted to know. He only wanted to forget.”
Yeah. This sucks.
“Ev told me he’ll have to fill out some forms,” Megan says. “Shouldn’t be that hard.”
“And we’re going to check everything Zane has told us,” I say. “We’ll dig into his past, unearth anything we can find.” And hope that won’t break him completely. “But what he has told us is very little. So we were thinking…” I catch Megan’s gaze and she nods. “Megan thought that maybe you’d know something more. Anything at all that Zane may have told you without realizing it’s important. Or…” God, this is hard to ask. “Or if he said something in his sleep, or during a flashback that you think could be important.”
I feel like I’m asking her to betray his trust in her, and from the wounded look she gives me, it’s clear she feels the same way.
But what she says is, “I’ll think about it.” The struggle in her gaze is painful to see. “If it’ll help him… I’d do anything for him.”
Even if it breaks his trust in her.
