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The minute I walk into Joe’s, I begin second-guessing my decision to come. All it’s going to take is one motherfucker opening their mouth about my arm and I’ll lose my shit. I should have thought this through. The last thing Lance and I need is a fight to break out. I don’t want any trouble back at the gym if they hear about me street fighting, not when I feel that’s the only place I really belong now. I place my main focus on the bar and just walk numbly behind Lance. He was so pumped I was coming tonight. He stops at the bar and I stand beside him.

It’s funny to think that a while back, when I had just moved to town, Ruston brought me here with Tamilyn. This is where everything basically began for me and it’s kind of bittersweet to be here again but a totally different person. I swallow back the memories and wait for the bartender to walk over.

When he finally notices Lance and me, we’re able to order drinks. I get a beer and sigh as I take a sip.

“See, isn’t that beer good?” Lance grins at me.

Rolling my eyes, I take another quick sip. “Yeah, it’s all right. I could have easily had one of these at my house.”

“Where’s your sense of adventure, man? You have a life to live, you know.”

“My sense of adventure cost me an arm, in case you forgot,” I deadpan. I’m not trying to be all negative but it’s seeming to come out that way. “I’m sorry, man, I’m just nervous about being here.”

“Don’t be. No one is going to say or do anything to you. We’re here to have a few drinks and a good time. I promised Hilary I was going to be on my best behavior and she promised she’d wait up for me when I got home.” He winks as he sips his drink. He’s so damn goofy, but he’s quickly become one of my best friends.

“Lucky you. Tonight, it’s just me and my left hand.”

“That’s the spirit!” he exclaims as he slaps me on the back. I cough, trying not to choke on the beer I’m currently trying to swallow. Afterwards, I’m able to laugh and it feels damn good.

A song starts playing overhead and I shake my head in disbelief. I know Lance is about to hear it and make a scene around us. He has some weird fetish with Taylor Swift songs I just don’t understand.

“Oh damn, this is my shit!” he yells. See, I knew it was coming. He begins belting out “Bad Blood” and I continue to drink my beer. “Come on Austin, I know you know the words.”

“Sadly, I do. It’s all your fault.” This song can’t end fast enough. People are beginning to cheer him on. What the hell is wrong with these people? I laugh because at least this corny-ass moment is helping me forget everything wrong in my life.

I glance around at the women in the bar wondering what would happen if I were to go and try to talk to any of them. The old Austin would have had no problem sauntering over to them and throwing out a few pickup lines, but I just don’t seem to have the courage to approach anyone yet. I didn’t come here for women, though, I came here with my friend to have a drink.

When the song finally ends, I let out a sigh of relief. I could strangle the DJ for playing it. In fact, I almost want to go over and beg him not to play anything else that will make Lance go all psychotic in this place.

I go to take a sip of my beer and realize it’s empty. I must have finished it when Lance was exploring his musical career. I order another beer and take a sip. My eyes continue to roam the place, I can’t help it.

My gaze settles a few spots down at the bar and my jaw drops. Either I’m delusional or that’s Paige, the nurse I’ve practically dreamed about since that day I woke up in ICU. I want to walk up to her but I notice she’s talking to a guy. That’s about my fucking luck. As I watch her, though, I realize she’s yelling at him. Her finger is in his face. Despite all her rage, he’s just staring blankly at her.

“Earth to Austin, what are you staring at?”

“Oh shit, sorry. I, uh, nothing. I’m just looking around.”

“You’re a fucking liar.” I look over at Lance.

“Maybe I am. At least I don’t sing Taylor Swift.”

“Don’t be jealous. I see you staring at that girl over there. I’d say go talk to her but she looks like she’s ripping that guy a new asshole.” His brow is scrunched and the sour look on his face is cracking me up.

“I know her. She was the first nurse I saw when I woke up in ICU,” I explain quickly to him.

“Lucky bastard. My luck, I would have woke up to some old wrinkly grandma. You should go say hi; that guy just walked off.”

I look in her direction and realize he’s right. The guy is gone and Paige is walking in this direction. “I can’t talk to her,” I tell him. Geez, I sound like a fucking pussy right now.

“Why not?”

I point towards my arm and cringe as she nears our vicinity.

“Hello, asshat, she’s seen your arm before. You were in ICU. Use those nuts.”

I close my eyes and hope when I open them she’ll have already passed, but I forget Lance has a big fucking mouth. “Hey! Nurse lady, come see!”

I open my eyes and glare at Lance. If I had my fucking right arm, I would punch him. Paige’s eyes meet mine and I swallow like I want to drink her down. Now I’m thirsty, so I hurry and take a sip of the beer in my hand.

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