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Once he lost this woman he would be permanently blind and dumb, deaf and insensate because everything he felt and loved and needed was in her.
When he moved inside her she let go a scream of delight and tightened around him like altitude, knocking his breath out, making him light-headed. Nothing else was gentle or slow from that point. Or quiet. They tore the bed up, they bruised each other. She shouted his name. He fought off impending numbness by drowning in the abandon of her and when they hit the summit, the flood of release was an avalanche, burying them both in gasping wonder.
He slept like he was innocent, heavy, complete, and that too was a bitter thing, to have that luxury along with the softness and comfort of her.
Taylor saw them off. She hugged him hard and too long. She didn’t approve but she didn’t have all the details either and even then she’d hate him for this. Georgia was excited. A return to the UK she never imagined making so soon.
Inside the airport terminal he handed her the e-ticket and an envelope with the details of a car service, and an apartment he’d booked her into. He’d managed to steel his expression till now, not wanting to spoil even this for her before he had to. But he stank of it, his despair, his determination.
And she knew.
She clutched at his jacket. “You’re not coming with me, are you?”
He could’ve said a million things to make this easier, but it was past time for cowardice. “No.”
“Can’t or won’t, Damon.”
Her voice was stomped flat and concertinaed hard like a drink can.
He swallowed, forced the lie out. “Won’t.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I have other things to do.”
“Other things to do? What kind of a reason is that? You let me think this was a trip for both of us. You had no intention of coming with me. Are you sending me away? Getting rid of me?”
“It’s not like that.”
“What is it like then? Because it sure feels like that. You suggest this out of nowhere, plan it in record time; money, resources, spare no expense. You packed a bag. I watched you.”
He reached for her but she moved away.
“I should’ve known something was off when I saw Taylor’s face. How she held on to you on the verandah. You need to tell me right now what’s going on.”
“Stand closer to me and lower your voice.”
“I’ll stand wherever I want and speak however I want. I don’t need you to advise me on my behaviour.”
He didn’t want a scene, but part of him needed this anger from her. “You and Hamish, it has nothing to do with me.”
“This is about me and you, not Hamish. He’s ten thousand miles away.”
“There is no me and you.”
She must’ve reeled in shock. He longed for a slap. To hear her walk away, to know she was on the plane and on her way.
“Are you sick? Is something else wrong with your throat? You’ve never stopped coughing, clearing it. You said that would stop.”
“There’s nothing wrong with me.”
“So yesterday, last night, there was a you and me. We ride in a taxi and now suddenly there isn’t. Did we drive through some kind of time machine?”
He had no response for her. His head was spinning so hard he was barely holding on. He went for his pocket and pulled out his folding stick.
“Damon. I need to understand what’s happening here.”
“Go to the check-in, wait in the lounge. Get on the plane. Stay in London as long as you need. I’ve prepaid your rent here for three months.”
