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The song ended and Ryder twirled Sam out to the end of one hand before twirling her back again, Sam’s adorable laughter filling the studio till it tinkled off the windows. One of the bricks around her heart crumbled and fell.
When Ryder wrapped his arms around his little sister and dropped a kiss atop her head, it took everything Nadia had not to crumble completely at the tenderness of it all. The adoration. Intimate, private, true. It was like a foreign language to Nadia, and yet in that moment she felt a funny flicker of comprehension. As if she just needed to tilt herself on the right angle and she’d understand it all.
And then, when Ryder’s gaze once more landed on hers, and he smiled just for her, like a flash bomb blooming from the centre of her heart and all the way out to her extremities, she understood all too well. She did everything in her power to contain the ominous surge, employing every formidable muscle, every bullet-proof nerve, every form of self-protection she had in her potent arsenal.
They didn’t make a dent. The light of her tender feelings for Ryder filled her till it all but lifted her from the chair.
Her heart continued to beat. Her lungs continued to breathe. Yet she knew everything had changed. Only with the familiar dull ache of her messy conversation with her mother still riding her, and with no example of what the hell to do about these wholly new feelings flinging about inside her, all she could do was rewrap herself in the scattered remains of her fortitude, and hold on tight.
Her throat felt raw when she called out, “That’s a wrap, kids.”
“But we have ten more minutes!” said Sam, the adrenalin of the dance still pouring through her.
“I do believe Miss Nadia intends for us to quit while we’re all ahead.”
Nadia flinched as Ryder’s deep sonorous voice slid inside her as if he had some kind of inside track. Some door only he knew how to open. She wished she could just shut it down, but she hadn’t a clue where the opening was.
“That’s right, kid!” she said, standing and wrapping an arm about Sam’s shoulders. “You done good. So scat.”
With a sigh, and a twirl, Sam gathered her things, gave Nadia a kiss on the cheek, informed them Ben had been waiting in the car below the whole time, then disappeared out the door, leaving Nadia alone with Ryder after all.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?” Ryder said, cutting to the point.
“You’re ready, that’s what,” she said, avoiding eye contact as she pretended to tidy sheets of piano music that hadn’t been looked at in decades. “Now I can safely send you two out onto that dance floor and not be mortified to put my name to it.”
“That’s not what I mean and you know it. You’ve had news?”
News? The auditions. Right.
She tensed when she felt him move in behind her. And when Ryder’s hand landed on her waist the light inside her shone so bright it was blinding. It took everything she had not to lean into all that strength and warmth. Instead she turned out of his grasp, and held onto the bookshelf behind her for support. “No news. Not for a few days, I’d say. Maybe longer.”
Ryder’s hot eyes landed on her mouth, and her brain waves skittered out of control. Only now she’d somehow lost the ability to bring them back to earth.
“I’d wondered,” he said, frowning even as his eyes darkened. “Considering you’ve been acting like a cat on a hot tin roof since I arrived.”
She had? Oh, right. Her mum. The light inside her dimmed a fraction, which should have been welcome, but instead she fisted her hands at her side and tried to press her mother out of her head. Out of her damn heart. The reason Nadia wasn’t coping with the feelings skittering about inside her like a normal person was because of her in the first place.
“Everything else okay?”
She shook her head. Nodded. Opened her mouth to tell him about the call, knowing this man of all men would understand better than anyone.
But it wasn’t his concern. Could never be.
She took a deep breath and looked him in the eye. “Everything’s hunky-dory.”
Smart guy, he clearly didn’t believe her. But for whatever reason he didn’t press. Instead he said, “Prove it. Let go of the damn shelf, woman, and come here.”
Despite the emotional roller coaster going off the rails inside her, Nadia’s mouth twitched into a smile. And following her wicked feet and anaemic heart, she went to him, but at the last she pressed her hand against his chest, as if keeping their hearts apart was her last stand.
“You may have led Sam with some aplomb back there, Ryder, but I’ll have you know I’m still the boss in this room.”
