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Rather than responding calmly like I’d love to, I end up blurting out a few of my many questions as my head whips back and forth between them. “But what about your vacation rule? When exactly did you realize? Wait, when did you even talk about it? I’ve been here the whole time!”

“I think we’d like to be done with our vacation rule,” Patrick explains. “To be honest, things have always been different with you than our other hookups, but after the first couple of days here, we realized how perfectly you fit in with us, how much fun the three of us have. Yes, during sex, but also just hanging out. You somehow manage to amplify all of the positive qualities of our relationship. There’s nothing missing in our marriage, but we don’t think we should limit the joy, happiness, or love in our life simply because we’re married.”

I blink, jaw slack in surprise, letting the words settle in.

This is actually happening.

I still have no idea why they seem to think I’m worth what they’re suggesting. Harry wouldn’t even consider moving back to New York with me, and we were together for over ten years. We’ve only been here for a few days, and what they’re suggesting would completely change our lives.

My heart is racing, but I’m unable to actually react as Patrick continues.

“I asked you if I could treat you the same way I do Joey, and it’s been so natural this week, but it’s also more than that,” he admits, glancing at his husband as he reaches out to grab his hand too before turning back to me. “Sweetheart, I’m not treating you the exact same way I do him, because you don’t need the same things from me. I’ve really enjoyed learning what makes you smile, or laugh, what makes your whole face light up with joy. I like being a part of the reason why you look like that. I’ve also really enjoyed seeing your and Joey’s relationship developing, seeing the ways you both make the other happier. To be honest, I don’t want any of this to end when we go back to New York.”

“And to answer your question,” Joey adds. “We talked about this in the hot tub the other night while you were making drinks. We didn’t want to overwhelm you by bringing it up so early in our time here, but we’re tired of waiting.”

“Oh my god. That was only like… our third day here,” I point out as I continue to look between them. “How are you so ready to, what, open up your marriage? After so little time. And it’s only been a few days since then. What if you change your mind when we get back to New York, and we’re not in this winter-wonderland bubble with just the three of us?”

They exchange a sheepish smile before shrugging at me. “This might seem sudden, but we’ve known each other for a long time, and it feels right,” Patrick answers. “I don’t think it’s the circumstances here. It’s you.”

“None of us can promise anything, but we want to try if you do,” Joey continues, taking my other free hand so the three of us are connected. “Yeah, it will likely be complicated when other people find out, but the only people’s opinions I care about anymore are in the room with me. I don’t want to hide anything. I think any of the judgment or questions would be worth it if the three of us got to be together for real.”

“Am I dreaming?” I ask, looking back and forth between their hopeful expressions.

“Is that a yes? Does that mean you want to date us, too?” Patrick teases.

I let out a surprised laugh. “It honestly sounds too good to be true.”

“That sounds like a yes?” Joey repeats, grinning massively. “But you haven’t actually said it. Maybe you could try out our radical honesty approach? I know you haven’t given us an answer but this will only work if we communicate.”

I nod a few times as I attempt to gather my thoughts as I allow myself to picture what they’re suggesting. For so many years, I thought Harry would be my future. Sure, we weren’t head over heels for each other like Joey and Patrick, but I thought we were happy enough. I figured after how long we’d been together, we’d stay together. I certainly didn’t think I’d be starting over in my forties, imagining just how good my life could be with these two incredible men.

The fear of it potentially falling apart if we try is terrifying, though. Joey’s right, none of us can promise anything, and not only would we have to deal with the drama and complications of being a public throuple, but if things didn’t work out, it would likely mean losing their friendship. I care deeply for each of them, even if this might be the first moment I’m allowing myself to truly examine my feelings for them beyond that; I don’t even want to think about the idea of losing them entirely.

But I also really, desperately want what they’re offering.

“Okay. I want to say yes,” I start. “But I wasn’t expecting any of this, so I’m trying to wrap my mind around it all. I’ve been trying not to think about how well we all fit together all week because there was an end date, and now you’re offering me everything I didn’t think I could ask for.”

I wish I could stop there, they both look so happy at that response. But Joey is right, if there’s any shot of this actually working, I need to be honest. Or at least more honest. “But I’m also nervous. Things are great here, but I’m worried that without the holiday and the seclusion it won’t be as easy as we want it to be. I’ve never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I have no idea how that would actually work.”

“It would be a first for all of us,” Joey acknowledges.

“There is a lot to consider,” Patrick agrees. “But if you’re open to exploring this with us, maybe we could start with the date today? Talk more about it over dinner in town?”

I chew on my lip as I try to focus on just today, one date. That does sound really nice, and it’s basically what we were already doing with a different label. I just need to make sure I don’t get ahead of myself. One day at a time.

“Okay, yeah. I think I’d like that,” I finally respond with a big smile that they both immediately mirror. “I guess we don’t need to have it all figured out right away; it’s just hard for me not to jump into planning mode sometimes.”

“Hell yeah, I can’t wait,” Joey says, squeezing my hand.

“I hope you’re ready for the best first date ever,” Patrick warns with a smirk.

I can’t believe this is actually happening.

I really need to talk to Tara, and I don’t think a quick update text is going to cut it, but I think that’ll have to wait because I have a date to go on.

23

“Idon’t think I’ve gone ice skating since the last time I was in New York,” Scotty comments nervously as he laces up his skates.