Page 24

He drew in a deep breath and released it slowly. “If you remember, my father had passed away the week before.”

“I remember,” she said softly. She couldn’t help but remember that night. His father’s heart attack and death had half broken Johnny.

“We had the reading of the will the day before I left town. In it, my father left everything to his no-good lazy son who would probably burn through the money and ruin the company within a year.”

She saw his hands tighten on the steering wheel as shock raced through her. “That’s really what the will said?”

“Verbatim.” He shot her a quick glance and then returned his gaze to the road. “You should have seen the lawyer’s face when he read it. He was as embarrassed as I was.”

“Oh, Johnny, I’m so sorry for you,” she said, knowing how those final words from his father must have devastated him.

“I should have expected it. He never had a kind word to say to me when he was alive, and he still couldn’t say a kind word to me in death. Anyway, the next day the company was awarded the big shopping center job in Texas.” He shot her another quick glance.

“I made a huge mistake, Mimi. I chose business over love. Like a damn fool, I was trying to prove my worth to a dead man, and that’s why I left town and went to the job in Texas. As crazy as it sounds, I thought I needed to prove myself to my dead father.”

She studied his handsome profile for a long moment as she slowly digested his words. “Couldn’t you have told me all this before you left? You not only didn’t call me, but you changed your phone number so I couldn’t get in touch with you.”

The hurt and the pain of that time came roaring back inside her. She’d been utterly devastated when he left, and it had taken her months and months to get over it. She realized now she still wasn’t completely over it.

“I couldn’t talk to you, Mimi. I knew if I did, I would lose all my resolve and come running back here. I had to cut things off with you completely.” He shot her a quick glance and then looked straight ahead once again.

“You still should have told me instead of just ghosting me,” she replied. “It was a cruel thing to do. And five years, Johnny? Did it really take five years to build a shopping center?”

“It did. It was a huge job, but I swear to God, it was cursed from the very beginning. First of all, we had problems with the permits and then a bunch of our equipment and supplies were stolen. Then, one of the men working for me dropped dead, and the site was closed down for a full investigation. It was one bad thing after another, but I was determined to prove my father wrong. I had to make it a success, and I sacrificed us in the process. I was so stupid.”

A million emotions whirled in her head as she relived those days and weeks after he left. She’d deeply grieved for him, but there had been nobody to hold her while she wept. For days, she’d hoped he would come back to her. Then she’d realized she was pregnant. Despite the fact that she was alone with only Gramps as a support, she was happy to realize that she had a piece of Johnny even though he had left her.

The pregnancy forced her to pull herself together. She stuffed her heartache into the deep recesses of her mind and focused only on the health and welfare of her baby.

However, she’d also been scared, wondering what kind of a mother she would be. She’d had no real role model, except for her sweet grandmother, whom she’d had for far too short a time. Mimi had wondered if she would be enough as a single parent.

She had given birth all alone. She’d worked through the pain of the process with nobody else there to cheer her on. She hadn’t wanted her grandfather in the room with her. She’d only wanted Johnny, but of course he hadn’t been there.

“Mimi.” His voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and she realized he was pulling up to the swamp entrance. “Thank you for letting me explain it all to you.”

He parked the car and took off his seatbelt and then turned in the seat to face her. “Mimi, it was all a terrible choice,” he said. “I made a horrible mistake.”

“Five years of a mistake?”

For just a moment he looked abashed. “I was a prisoner to a dead man for those five years. I was emotionally unwell…confused. The minute the job was done, I hurried back here. Mimi, the important thing is I’m still in love with you. Can’t you find forgiveness for me in your heart? I never stopped loving you, and I want to build a life with you and Danny now and forever.”

“Johnny, I agreed to have dinner tonight with you, but that’s all I’ve agreed to,” she finally said with a frown. “To be perfectly honest, I don’t know how I feel about you right now. I need more time to sort things out.”

“I’ll give you time, Mimi. Take all the time you need. I just want you to know how I feel. I dream of that old shanty where we used to meet and the happiness I felt whenever you were in my arms. I want that happiness back again.”

Those old emotions surged up inside her, but she shoved them back down. She couldn’t love him right now on the basis of old memories. She refused to let the past dictate her future. She still had the taste of his complete abandonment in her mouth.

It had been particularly difficult because of her parents’ abandonment when she’d been young. She’d spent a lot of time in the darkness of the nights wondering what was wrong with her. Why did the people who were supposed to love her then leave her?

“It’s time I get home,” she finally said.

“I’ll walk you in,” he said.

“That’s not necessary,” she replied.

“Have you forgotten a serial killer is at work here?” he asked.

She opened her purse and pulled out her pink knife. She opened the long, razor-sharp blade and then gave him a grim smile. “I never go out unprotected. I’ll be fine, Johnny. I’ll just see you sometime tomorrow.”