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Yet when Ste was around Jonny he bloomed like a flower. Like now, as Jonny cupped Ste’s cheek and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Sorry sweetness, Daddy needed to take care of Lennon.”
“I’m having a crisis,” Lennon added, feeling the need to justify what Ste had probably witnessed through the window while waiting for them to come in.
“Can I help?” Ste gave him a hopeful smile. He really was a sweetheart.
Lennon noticed the smell coming from the kitchen and despite not feeling hungry, stated, “You can if that’s your sweet potato pie I can smell?”
Ste’s wide smile revealed a gap between his front teeth. “It is.”
“Then lead the way.”
Jonny gave him a nod of approval, the pair following Ste into a brightly lit kitchen. The soft lavender walls helped make the room feel less overpowered by the dark purple kitchen cupboards that Lennon had had his doubts about but did, in fact, work.
The table that sat next to sliding doors was laid out ready for them. Jonny took over and plated up the food.
“I got the feeling in the car that I was missing some information.” Jonny took his time with Ste’s meal, cutting it up to make it easier to feed him.
It was sweet the way he took care of Ste first, and though it wasn’t what Lennon was looking for in a relationship, he could most definitely see the appeal of someone taking care of his needs with such loving focus.
“Was I?”
Jonny’s gentle insistence got a resigned sigh, because he wasn’t wrong. “When he asked about me forgetting to lock the door, I felt he was blaming me. Like I’d done it on purpose.” He pushed the food around his plate. “I’d never do that, not intentionally.” He met Jonny’s stare. “I just can’t say if an unconscious part of me wanted someone to catch us—not the spanking—but the relationship bit. I’m seeing and listening to my friends talk about their relationships, and I’m jealous.”
He put his cutlery down, giving up on thoughts of eating. He massaged his temples, feeling the ache signaling the beginnings of a headache.
“It’s a normal reaction, squirt. Don’t beat yourself up over it. But can you define a relationship from just spanking him?”
Lennon hadn’t told Jonny about the shift from just spanking, to spanking and sex. “We had sex.”
Jonny came forward, feeding Ste, forgotten for the moment. “Lennon!”
He knew that Daddy tone and so did Ste, by the way he winced. “You’re going to give me the ‘I told you so’ speech aren’t you?”
Ste’s laugh was all nerves as Jonny rolled his eyes. “No, but I should. You knew what you were getting into with the increasing number of times you were spanking him. His reaction to them was bound to create a situation where sex became inevitable. Heck, I’m surprised you lasted as long as you did.”
“Thanks!” Lennon muttered, not holding back how miffed he was. “You know better than anyone I don’t sleep around with any alpha.”
Jonny took hold of Lennon’s hand to stop him playing with his fork. “I do, so that tells me what you haven’t said aloud. You’re in love with him.”
Trust Jonny to make him face reality. He sagged in his seat, the stingy eyes back at the utter truth. “He doesn’t want anyone to know about us. One and one make it easy to add up the facts. He’s not interested in more than spanking and sex.”
It was obvious, no matter how much it hurt to admit it. “It’s not Kodi’s fault, it’s mine. I was the one who initiated what is between us. I was the one to believe I could handle this situation.” He’d handled it all right, by handing his heart over to Kodi.
Kodi’s panicked look and the following one of relief when he’d told Lennon they had nothing to worry about, because Booker would keep quiet, was an ice bath challenge of reality he didn’t want but had gotten anyway.
“What are you going to do now?”
Lennon heaved out a breath, his chin trembling. “I’m going to pull my big boy pants up and own what I’ve done. If he runs, then I’ll deal, but things can’t continue the way they are.”
Lennon was ready the next morning with his bags packed, waiting downstairs at the curb for Kodi. When the big black SUV pulled to a stop and Jupiter bounced out, Lennon didn’t know what to make of it.
“Good to see someone has their act together,” Jupiter stated, his eyes moving to the back door that Kodi had opened. He looked like he’d not slept in days with how dark the circles were under his eyes. His suit was rumpled, and the shirt beneath wasn’t much better, the tie hanging crookedly.
“Fuck off, Jup. I was ready, you’re just stressin’ over every little thing right now.” Kodi’s tone held a bite to it that, though wasn’t unusual, didn’t match the levity of his expression when it landed fully on Lennon.
What is he trying to pull?
What does that even mean? He’s just standing there smiling at us.
