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“And just to say, if I had been dating I’d never have suggested spanking you.” He winked saucily when Kodi turned his attention to him. “Especially with how you get off on it.”

Kodi groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Did you have to remind me?”

“You smell of sex, it’s hard not to be reminded,” Lennon pointed out, struggling to keep his amusement under control and failing when he giggle-snorted.

“I’m not the only one,” Kodi fired back, a grin appearing that brightened his eyes. He picked up the burrito and bit into it groaning, “So good.”

Lennon took a mouthful of food, chewing and agreeing the seasoning was perfect. Spicy but not too hot.

The atmosphere became more relaxed. “I had to shift your heavy ass onto the bed so you didn’t end up stiff and sore, that’s why I smell.” Realizing a second too late what he’d said, Lennon heard Kodi coughing.

Eyes watering, he looked at Lennon red faced. “I’m always stiff and sore when I’m alone around you.”

There were several seconds of silence before the giggles started, and they seemed to set Kodi off. The two of them fell about laughing. They leaned against each other to hold one another up. “True. But only because you love it.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” Kodi murmured, sounding thoughtful.

“What are we going to do about it?” Lennon asked when they had finished their meal, driven to poke at the question that was now playing on his mind.

“That’s the big question.” Kodi pushed his empty plate away and sat forward, leaning an elbow on the countertop and placed his chin in his hand. “Is it too much to ask that you don’t date while we’re doing this?”

The hesitant question had Lennon consider his reply. “As I said, I wouldn’t feel comfortable spanking you and you getting off on it, while dating someone else. It would feel like cheating, and I’m not that vampire bat. When we choose someone, it’s for life—”

“But you said you had a boyfriend when you started working for us,” Kodi was quick to point out.

“I did, and for us it was a serious commitment. He was my first.” Lennon glanced out the darkening window above the kitchen sink, recalling how selfish Nate had been. “He didn’t get it when my attention got divided between him and work. I wanted to make a good impression, and I loved my job straight off. The challenge of it was exhilarating. It got so I couldn’t talk about it because he would get moody. The distance between us became a river I couldn’t navigate alone. It was his choice to leave, and it was the right one. I can’t say I wasn’t heartbroken at the time because I was. I’d been brought up to understand compromise was essential, but that it was a two-way thing. He wanted me to compromise, just not the other way around.”

Lennon slid off his seat, unable to sit still with the sadness weighing on him that came from remembering how he’d failed. It was why he tended not to talk about it and why he supposed he hadn’t gotten back out in the dating ring. Finding someone to spend his life with after such a failure was hard.

He picked up the plates. “Sorry, I didn't mean to lower the mood.”

Kodi got off his seat and came to where Lennon was standing, taking the plates from him. “You didn’t.” He turned to the sink, then glanced back, and something about his eyes had Lennon’s heart bounce against his ribs. “He was a fool when he couldn’t see what a gift you are.”

Chapter Sixteen

Kodi

This had to be one of the strangest days of his life. He’d gone from feeling awful to a tremendous high from the epic orgasm, to utter embarrassment at passing out and waking to find his cock hanging out and come over him and the covers of Lennon’s bed. Then this companionable meal, though it started out awkward, had ended up like eating at home, familiar and relaxed.

Lennon had a way about him—always had—of not making Kodi feel stupid for his overreactions. The increase in pressure when his parents retired had worked to undermine that. During the meal, Kodi realized it wasn’t the only reason he felt pressure with the changes. Being permanently allocated Lennon had given him anxiety because he was attracted to Lennon.

There, he’d admitted it to himself.

Because coming like a horny teenager isn’t enough of an indicator?

The sarcastic tone had Kodi give an indignant sniff, splashing soapy water over the rim of the sink.

“Do you want me to finish up?” Lennon’s quiet question drew his gaze.

They were the first words he’d spoken since Kodi had declared his ex was a fool. An odd fluttering in the middle of his chest unsettled him when he tried to imagine a faceless person committing themselves to Lennon. The sadness left Kodi reacting. His brain wasn’t engaged with his lips and out tumbled the thought before he could catch it. To hide his anxiety, he’d started to wash the pots. And if he was continuing with the honesty theme he was rocking, he didn’t want to leave. Thinking like that was dangerous with Lennon’s heat, he knew it, yet couldn’t seem to make himself leave.

“How do you cope with your heat?” he blurted out, when the thought jabbed at his brain like a knife.

The plate Lennon had dried clattered on the counter, his head swinging in Kodi’s direction.

“W-what?” he stammered.

Heat was becoming a constant feature with how hot his neck and face was. “It’s a valid question when you don’t have a boyfriend,” Kodi justified.